> So comic. I'm totally not a writer, so the dialogue will be dull and uninteresting, but at least you'll know what's going on. You have been warned.

Are you kidding? You have done great! 😋👍
Nicely done. Nice text - OK english is not my mother-language so I'm no expert... 😉

> And yeah, criticism are welcome

If you really want criticism, just a personal annotation: The boys clothes could be improved... A cute boy with such a shirt...
Why didn't he strip completely naked in page 6?
But as I said, just my personal taste...

And just a note to reality: On page 7: On her knees and impaled up to her lungs she wouldn't be able breath and unable to speak anything other than a gurgle, spiting blood...

BTW: Which hole is used for her impalement?