So, I've been into death scenes (which I'll call guro here for convenience) from the victim end as long as I can remember, and from the killer end since about age 13. I get a rush from imagining myself as either victim or killer in scenes, kind of like a whoosh (like falling backwards). It's intensely pleasurable, but clearly not sexual (although it is tied up with emotional and physical closeness). I'm generally attracted to women sexually, although I currently am dating a dude (who is my ideal victim type, which is both awesome and inconvenient), and I've only ever been into men (as victims, and as imagining myself as a male victim) in guro. I intensely, intensely dislike sexual/ized guro. Although adding it to sex would probably enhance a sexual experience, I feel no drive to do so.

Any of you experience something like this? I have talked to maybe 1.5 people who feel similarly. It's been a bit of a mystery. I'm very curious about what you guys think, and if you're like this, so let me know!