>>3718
I'm both a sadist and a masochist, and also pretty emphatic.

I get turned on when I feel pain, I get turned on by thoughts of being tortured. To a degree it is enjoyable. I like to cause myself pain, it is very much a turn on.
I am also a sadist, I get turned on by the thought of others in pain, or causing them pain. The thought of getting someone tied down and torturing them in a variety of ways, also very much a turn on.

I'm also emphatic, in fact, I get really in character in stories and my feelings mirror the character's feelings.
When a character in a story is tortured, I imagine myself being tortured as the character, and I also imagine myself torturing the character, it turns me on twice as much. I also imagine the tortured character enjoy it at some level or desire it, which, I guess, means I don't feel as bad about them being tortured.

It depends a bit on how it is portrayed. One thing that I generally need to enjoy my fantasies, is for the sadist to feel and portray a strong, possessive desire towards the masochist.

And then there's the matter of having a strong comprehension of the difference between what is just fiction (ethically fine) and non fiction (ethically questionable)

Outcome, I get turned on by some of the visions of the most vile tortures performed on the most innocent and vulnerable characters, and especially so when I love the tortured character
(if i don't like the character who is getting tortured, it doesn't turn me on all that much, because I can't relate to them as easily, my feelings don't mirror them, and it doesn't fulfill my masochistic urges)

I am not bothered by my fantasies.
That's kind of how it works for me. It's hard to describe because it's pretty complicated.