>>4352
Liker other times I will say that this is most likely not self hatred.
This is suicidal tendency especially if you mention self harm.
I think you are under pressure or in the situation which you see no exit and you dream about death as only possible solution.

Your parents are right for not believing in psychiatry , because this bogus science is not even close in success rate to what ancient religion and magic can do. Exorcist will do far better job than psychiatrist. LOL