>>11327
>Even if they do go insane they just ruined their chances to have a normal non-violent life.
Yes exactly. And that is the choice either you endure the abuse or you ruin your chances to have normal life which you probably never have anyway. In this situation level of your optimism will be the main factor that defines how much abuse you are willing to take believing that eventually, it will get better.

>This is entirely on the abuser’s fault.
The problem with this belief is that the abuser is not a human being with whom you can reason so it is irrelevant whose fault it is. It is the same as the force of nature. you do not blame bear which attacks you, you fight or run as you can and later you do not break to everyone that some evil bear ripped of your leg. you do not go on rallies demanding bears to stop attacking people. Or demanding hurricanes to stop demolishing houses.
So here the situation is exactly the same. You have a problem and you have to solve it. if you failed to solve it that's your fault, nobody's else.

>Imagine if I kidnapped you and forced you to choose between either killing yourself or killing a loved one (or if you don’t have a loved one, all your money and property). Now you can technically say you had a choice there but the whole point is the fact is that you shouldn’t have had to make that choice in the first place. The entirety of at least 99.99% of the blame is on me

Same here. You are irrelevant. In that situation, I am facing a problem and I have to solve it. Blaming you or reasoning with you will not do anything useful for me. In that situation, I can only think about how I can kick you in the balls or poke your eye or just try to kill myself and people I love painlessly to avoid unnecessary suffering. If I can't do anything at all I would just drop my pants and start to jerk off with hope to cum before you kill me.
Either way, you are entirely out of the picture here.

>Even if they do go insane they just ruined their chances to have a normal non-violent life. So that’s another way abuse victims are forced to suffer.

that is actually the main life skill you need to survive. you must be able to control your inner psychopath and use it properly.
this is a skill which everyone has to be told in their childhood to become respectable human beings who are neither psychopaths neither victims of psychopaths.
It is not necessary to always kill your bully, most often just giving a hint that you will give more trouble than benefit is enough