>>11329
>Same here. You are irrelevant. In that situation, I am facing a problem and I have to solve it. Blaming you or reasoning with you will not do anything useful for me. In that situation, I can only think about how I can kick you in the balls or poke your eye or just try to kill myself and people I love painlessly to avoid unnecessary suffering. If I can't do anything at all I would just drop my pants and start to jerk off with hope to cum before you kill me.
Either way, you are entirely out of the picture here.

On the contrary I would have complete control over you. In fact, everything would be done by my liking. Even the choices I give you would be nothing but an illusion on your end because in reality these are all my choices. I'm the one who would've given you the ultimatum out of my own sick games. If you are paralyzed, incapacitated, or immobilized then there's nothing you can really do about anything other than pray someone stops me.

>The problem with this belief is that the abuser is not a human being with whom you can reason so it is irrelevant whose fault it is. It is the same as the force of nature. you do not blame bear which attacks you, you fight or run as you can and later you do not break to everyone that some evil bear ripped of your leg. you do not go on rallies demanding bears to stop attacking people. Or demanding hurricanes to stop demolishing houses.
So here the situation is exactly the same. You have a problem and you have to solve it. if you failed to solve it that's your fault, nobody's else.

This is the crux of the issue and there are multiple things that need to be addressed here. First, unlike hurricanes, humans and even bears have culpability. If a bear eats someone we hunt and put down the bear because a. they are an active threat now that they have a taste for humans and could potentially pass that down to their kids. and b. to scare future bears from attacking humans. This approach is part of why animal predators are so averse to attacking humans. Likewise abusers should get arrested, shamed, and have any authority taken away from them.
However, when it comes to victims, an unannounced freak hurricane is not the fault of the people hurt by them. It's just a tragedy. A surprise attack by a hungry bear even if a camper has been vigilant and armed as possible is not the camper's fault. It is the bear's. Likewise it is not the fault of the abuse victim when they're at the complete mercy of the abuser, it is the abuser's. There can be some subjective give and take when it comes to victims who have more power who may have been able to fight back more if they tried but the primary fault is still the abuser. That's just common sense.