>>11335
>Yes, you have complete control over my body or life but not over my mind. If I am paralyzed then it is all meaningless because I can not take any actions and your demands and choices are pointless. so being rational person you will not ask me to do anything I can't do. If you want to use me in some ways you need to allow me to have some freedom like if you ask me to kill my family you probably need to give me a gun or something and then I have the freedom to do whatever I like in that context.

Well, that's the point. As the one in control, I'm the one responsible for everything. I could do a trick question and have it so that the choice you pick is the one you DON'T want. Or I could just be straightforward. There's no way for you to be certain. Pleading for your life could just make more sadistic and enjoy your torment. Or perhaps it could make me feel sorry for you to let you go. Being defiant or not giving a shit what I do to you could impress me. Or it could >>11335
exasperate me and just make me want to torture you more. This is why you can't blame victims for not knowing what to do. The entirety or 99% of the blame is on the perpetrator. They're the ones in control of almost everything.

>well if you blame abuser in the same way as a bear or hurricane I can not object, but I assumed we were talking about a different thing. although in that situation you should not cover yourself with honey and then wander in the forest saying that "I have a right to dress however I like and bears should not attack me" You have to take appropriate precautions against those things and gross negligence in regards to your safety will be on your conscience.

I think we're coming to an understanding. Yeah, we must've been on different pages before because I am referring to blaming the abuser in the same vein as blaming a bear or a power outage. Like sure, you could've backed things up, maybe had things printed down so you can still work on it on paper, maybe have backup battery. But that's still a lot of extra work and wasted time that's no fault of your own. The power outage is still at fault and reasonable bosses will generally be understanding and put that into consideration. Of course if "power outages" keep happening all the time, then it's fair to get suspicious but taking advantages of excuses is another subject entirely.
Also, yeah there is also a difference between negligence/being the aggressor like your honey example and being an abuse victim solely because the abuser chose you due to no fault of your own. The latter is what I'm referring to.

>do not misunderstand me that I am always blaming victims, victims need help, but they must also show some effort to deal with the situation as well rather than bragging about their suffering and doing nothing at all. If I see that victim can do something but refuses to do it then I declare that it is the choice.

Then I am in agreement. I did mention there is some relative give and take with some people having a lot more options than others. And of course victims SHOULD try to do everything in their capacity to stand up for themselves. And after all, if no one knows about it, who can help them? The first step is in getting people to know about their predicament. But yeah, my argument is that you can't blame victims when things are just outside of their capacity and that most of the blame still lies on the abuser in the first place even if the victim is a moron (which I agree you can give partial blame to).