You talk like a woman, because you rely on possibilities not probabilities. Yes of course there are few nymphomaniac women and there are few dickless asexusl men but what matters is statistic, it is how likely you are to meet what you want an how much competition there will be.
Those women are very rare and there are lots of men who want them, so it is absolutely pointless to even bother.
I just said that if someone gets lucky to meet such woman be happy because you got something what most will never have.
many men live in completely sexless marriages for decades and their wives stop having sex with then next day after wedding

What you say about swarms of men harassing women is actually what I explained above too, and it also proves my point. because if by some miracle you there is a woman who has any value to a man and everyone wants her she naturally gets overwhelmed and starts chasing away everyone, because no matter what is her sex drive or what are her interests she will not have sex with 100 men at once neither she can have that many friends competing with each other for her.
If men and women were similar there woud be no swarms of men chasing women, because everyone woud find someone easily and there woud be a balance both genders woud chase each other.

Yes some people get lucky by accident if they somehow meet each other without advertising themselves and without competition like you visit your grandma in the village and meet a pervert girl there. But woud I rely in that to happen? No that's not going to happen in real life even if it does happen for some people.
internet probably makes things worse to some extent, because now we can see what we will never have and how extraordinary lucky some people get.

I do not treat women as objects and that is precisely what I am absolutely NOT interested into. I do not need a sex object I need a sex human who woud make her own decision and take initiative by herself not some sex doll who expects me to do everything and she will react to my actions at best. and this is not something what can happen on this world. because you want it or not women are sex objects only and never be anything else If you don't make initiative you are object by definition to be a human you have to do things yourself. And do more than just cover yourself into shiny wrapping expecting that a customer will pick you from the pack of other objects.

And speaking about those female fantasies they are nearly all about being sex object. it is super rare to find any woman whose fantasy is to take the lead in relationship.