Looks like you now started to understand what i meant.
>though we might disagree on the extent of skew
the problems with that extent than that it highly depends on the distance from the norm.
If you are average male and average female then yes difference is not that big, although still very significant to cause problems.
but if we go to the edges differences become very extreme.

>Women are bigger fans of erotic fiction than men, for example.
this may be true but But at least for me it is not like that at all. I woud say that in my puberty I had absolutely no interest in any of that anatomy, neither I even had any clue that it has any importance. I did not even know that it is in any way related to girls or women. Just later I found out that you are supposed to look for certain things. But everything started from the fiction. visual interest was also extencion fo that fiction because it was mostly based on seeking forbidden thing. in societies where women walk naked men have no reaction to their bodies and even in our society men do not react to almost naked women in the beach but they will jerk on the same thing in on the porn page.
So it is not so much about looks as it is about the message sent with those looks.


>there is still the desire to GET warmed up. I add this on top of what I said above.
But desire to get warmed up is not sex drive it is just knowledge that this way you can acquires some pleasure, yes some women may act on that or maybe even get addicted to that pleasure.
the requirement of warm up we could define as "sex brake" not as "sex drive" and in that case the less warmup is required the better. Maybe with extreme effort and creating ideal conditions you could even arouse asexusl person but to do that you must have absurdly high sex drive or expectations to justify all that effort and expenses.

Without sex drive there is very little chance that woman will take the risk and initiative she will just wait and demand the guy to make all effort and depending on the amount of warmup required it can take from just few minutes to talking to many months of expenses building emotional connection with unpredictable results.

Men also are have desire to get warmed up because after your puberty ends you sex drive is not that extreme either. Even with high sex drive you do have it you still very much enjoy warm up.
Youm mentioned that you girfriend was just slapping your but when she wanted sex. That does not look like much of effort from her side in comparison to a guy who needs to take her on a date and spend money or otherwise work alot to create proper atmosphere. Even your girlfriends seem to expect you to be ready all the time and do not make any effort to warm you up.


>Hunter gatherers have no personal wealth or inheritance.
Peasants and workers also had no inheritance or wealth so inheritance issues only apply to aristocracy but majority is not aristocracy.

>The purpose is to ensure that she belongs to him.
She belongs to him either way but it will not guarantee fidelity because even circumcised woman will still enjoy attention will still agree to have sex even if it does not lead to orgasm. You said it yourself that women care about feelings more. The most it will do is prevent woman from actively seeking sex.
But if you are high value man you want woman who is not wasting time on masturbation or otherwise getting distracted from her duties. You do not want someone who is fantasizing about something rather than cleaning up your room or milking your cows. By my knowledge women in africa are way more sexal and they even harass tourists inviting them to have sex. their society does not keep sex as some super secret like ours.