>>19134

Ma'am, this is a guro site.

What anon said, we specialize in guro here, not tranny cringe.

Why's it obscure? Because trannies are ugly as fuck, and it's a shit fetish.

you’re fucking insane if you think you’re “straight.” just own up to it and be a respectable faggot.

>>19134

>I say this ,as a straight male who fantasies a lot about an attractive trans woman raping me

This is a definition of straight that I wasn't previously aware of.

>>19140 lol

>>19139
I guarantee there's a trans fetish site somewhere out there, and someone says something like "... Not guro cringe

Why is it obscure? Because guro is disgusting and it's a shit fetish"

Don't act like you're better than they are we're all freaks just in different ways.

I don't get the trans top thing anyway, so it's like a girl/boy centaur? Girl top half but with a dick? Not for me thanks but you do you OP

>>19146
"top" means someone who takes a dominant role during sex

>>19134
i think i know everything about everything kink related, but sometimes i get these random culture shocks, and this is one of them

>>19146
agreed. no shaming

>>19134
this is, as pointed out, a gore website. I didn't delve much into psychology of mtf, so I can only guess. I think you'll find better luck in trans circlejerks, there are a lot of them, find the one that doesn't kinkshame and shoot

>>19146
Not acting "better". It's a shitty fetish. I don't care if people view guro the same way. I already know guro is a fucked fetish. Trannies are shit, and this is a guro board. If you wanna make tranny guro, be my guest, but if it isn't on topic then I don't want to see or hear about that trash. If it's shaming? Idgaf. I'll gladly shame what I hate.

Hi OP, I am a transgender sex worker, 27 yo and saw your post. I used to spend a lot of time on this site 10 years ago before I transitioned. Funny enough someone from this site actually told me at the time to maybe transition but I didn’t listen to her and didn’t figure it out until many years later

I was seeing an older client on Thursday morning this week who wanted to cross dress and have me top him. He gave me $1250 for doing it

To answer your question, this fantasy of yours makes no sense in real life because trans women don’t actually want to top men. Like in my case, there’s no enjoyment I get from doing that, and in fact I find it depressing, but nonetheless it’s good money

I get why you would want to ask this though, because I had the same fantasy as you 10 years ago. I wanted to be topped but I didn’t find any appeal in the idea of two men being together. I preferred imagining it would be a futanari, even though I never thought that would be real life, just imaginary

A few years later though I did just start letting men fuck me, even though I wasn’t into them. I realized it didn’t matter, I was into getting topped, so who really cares if it’s a man or a woman. And it didn’t have to be any more complicated than that

A few more years went by, and I moved to the city. Later that year I met a trans girl for the first time, who I matched with me on tinder. I ended up falling in love with her, even though she didn’t reciprocate. And to clarify, no she never topped me, because she never wanted to. She was the girl, I was the guy, so she only ever bottomed

But after that I finally realized the truth about myself, that I’m a woman and have always been a woman. I didn’t like topping that trans girl any more than I did with cis women… it was fine, an ego boost always to get some pussy but it didn’t really feel amazing like good sex should. On the other hand, getting fucked felt like everything to me.

I’ve since realized that I actually am not into women at all, including trans women, and I never sexually was into any women in the first place. The reality is I am a straight trans woman, I really only like having sex with straight men. Gay men weird me out. I need someone traditionally masculine who can last or I’m not into it. I love me a stud too, one of the guys I was seeing earlier this year would fuck me for literally like 5 hours straight before he could feel satisfied. Dude was a monsterrrr

What I didn’t realize when I was younger was like, I never really wanted to be the man with a woman, or the man with a man. What I always wanted and needed was to be the woman with a man.

It’s unfortunate that I’m not lesbian because then I might be able to have a decent life at least. Idk, I tried to date other trans women a lot of times but it never worked out and I don’t think it’s for me. And definitely not cis women, no thank you ew

But yea, I was trying to find a boyfriend for a few years but have kinda realized that’s never going to happen either. The only guys that want me it’s just because they want some pussy and know that trans are slutty enough to do it casually. Or because they want me to top them, which I don’t want to do at all

Which is why I started doing sex work, because if I’m giving it out for free I may as well charge

I’ve really really tried to figure out some other aspects of my life as well like my career, I did a degree in science and published 3 papers when I was younger, but found I didn’t care about science enough or believe in it. Same with music, I did music for like 10 years and had some really great memories from it.

But in the end nothing has ever stuck with me. I’ve never been able to keep any of the people I met in my life, or any of the skills I learned.

I dreamed of moving back to California for so long, and I’m gonna be having bottom surgery next year, if I live that long. Which would be amazing, but I’m also terrified of the healing.

Idk, I know I need to go back to working with kids this year because I do think that’s my calling in life. But I’m so tired, and scared, to be honest I don’t want a next chapter anymore. I just want to be done

Earlier today I went downtown and was trying to get in to some really tall hotels and office buildings to try and get to the elevator but they kept stopping me in the front area. I’m just, done with everything, I think I have lived enough now. I think I just need to lie to the people in the hotel and act confidently next time so I can get to the elevator and go up to the top. We’ll see, maybe I can go back downtown soon and try again

Idk in the meantime I thought I’d check this site and saw ur post and so I thought I’d comment

If you don’t believe me I can literally send you my Tryst page which is set to $800/h right now. My body turned out better than I ever could have hoped, I never thought I would have a chest like this when I’m so thin. But I don’t care anymore…I’m a girl, so it’s kinda just normal yknow. A stupid girl unfortunately, or I would know better than to have sex before having a committed boyfriend. But that ship has definitely sailed now smh

Especially stupid part is I literally got hit on by some guy while I was trying to kill myself wandering around downtown trying to get into tall buildings

He was pretty cute but I had to just ignore him repeatedly and I honestly felt bad. But the truth is there’s no point in talking to someone like that, because he probably didn’t realize I’m trans. Or he did realize, and wanted to just get laid. Either way I’m pretty sure all he wanted was to get laid, even though he was polite, but a man in the street only ever wants one thing. And I don’t fuck for free anymore

One last thing, since you requested that specific type of content. Here’s one of the ones that I saw and saved like 10 years ago

>>25018

I don't want to turn this into a therapy board, but fuck achy... some of the things you said were really familiar to me. Just being tired of life and the way it just keeps going on and on, completely exhausting, "I don't want a next chapter anymore I just went to be done". I hope you don't end things, and there's loads of reasons I want to say but though I mean them all truly they just sound like platitudes and I remember hearing things like "things can and usually do get better" or "you deserve to be able to be happy and feel good things and you can't do that if you're dead" or "no matter how alone or uncared for you feel, your death would ruin someone else's life, would put a lot of extra sadness into the world onto other people". But I never found any of that stuff helpful or meaningful when I was in a low spot, as I was off and on every few months for like 15 years. I guess I didn't believe people when they said those things to me, I knew they weren't being honest, or maybe they were being honest but they just didn't know they were wrong. So I'm not sure what I could say to properly get across to you what I mean, to get you to consider that maybe the way you feel rn doesn't have to be the way you feel forever, or that other people do genuinely care. Not everyone obviously but some people.

Stick around long enough to get your surgery and to be able to wake up in the morning with your own real body as your mind knows it shouldve been all along. Then find the next thing you want to stick around for, and work toward that. Go back to working with kids, but don't think of it as "finding your calling" like it's the one thing you were meant to do, don't put it up on a pedestal like it's The Thing that'll make life finally make sense, there is no One Thing that does that. Life isn't a puzzle with some solution to be figured out, it's a perpetual stew that keeps getting added to with every thing you've ever done. Sometimes it's intolerably shit and others it's pretty good, so add the ingredients you like and that give you a sense of purpose, it'll eventually get better.

You'll spend eternity being dead, no harm in letting it wait a few more decades before you get there. There's no rush

And "that ship has sailed" is such a cop out, so fatalistic, like you know what the future has in store for you. So many men seem to be the fucking worst I agree, no offence to all the guys on here, but the world is so fucking huge, there's definitely one or two real people out there

>>19134 sure, right, "straight male", uh-huh. Anon you're some flavour of queer and honestly all the labels are exhausting so who the hell cares what you are, gay/straight/bi/pan/ whatever, we just made up some words and neat categories and we want everything and everyone to fit into them perfectly but that's not how things work. Call yourself what you want, make sense of things however you want to, but maybe the reason there isn't much chicks-with-dicks stuff on a guro website is for the same reason you don't get many pizzas from an ice cream place. We have standards here, we're here to get off to people getting skinned and spit roasted and decapitated. You know, the normal kind of stuff

There's overlaps to everything and everyone's yuck is someone else's yum. I guess what you're looking for just isn't popular enough with people who post here. I bet pixiv has a bunch of stuff though?

And yeah to second what achy said about RL trans people for your fantasy... While there's always someone out there who'll feel differently I think most trans girls probably wouldn't like topping, especially a nice respectable "straight" male like yourself. It's probably a weird and uncomfortable feeling to have what is basically a weird birth defect that you haven't gotten corrected, fetishized by someone. If you're paying then there's always some amount of money enough to make someone pretend to like something as part of a roleplay, or to find someone who really does like it, but if you're hoping to live out a fantasy like that for real no pretending then... Good luck. Maybe expand your fantasies to include girls with a strap on? What's the difference to you?