Twilight's Dinner Party, part 1; by The Bizarre One
- Tags: Cooking; cannibalism.
- And here it is. Only took me about four days. I suspect this could use some improvement... once again, I'm using brainless clones who don't react much to what's happening to them, so they don't react much. Also, I may get a little overly technical in my descriptions.
- By the way, at least two of the six recipes in here are taken from an actual cooking show. (Where they were done with turkey and a large portion of beef, respectively.) Three more use methods that are relatively common in cannibalism fiction, and the last recipe is outright borrowed from another guro fic that I've read. (I have no way of reaching the author to ask for permission, but I doubt they'll mind.) I'll let the reader guess which is which.

***
"Mm..." Twilight's eyes fluttered as she awoke.

Hearing a soft yawn next to her, she smiled and looked to her left. "Good morning, Derpy."

The blonde pegasus woman looked back with a smile. "Good morning yourself, Twilight."

"Big day today," Twilight told her. "Ready to get cooking?"

"Absolutely," Derpy told her. "I can't wait to see the looks on our friends' faces when they find out what's on the menu."

"Neither can I." Snuggling closer to her lover, Twilight let her mind drift. Years ago, she and her apprentice, occasional lover (once she came of age) and, most recently, officially adopted daughter Liza Doolots had developed a way to create mindless clones of ponies, which the pair could then transplant the donor's still-living brain into, should their original body have become too sick or injured to function properly. Alternately, the clones could just be cooked and eaten, though this was rarer due to the monetary costs involved.

A little over a year ago, Twilight's friend Derpy had suffered an accident that had severed her spinal cord, leaving her paralyzed from the waist down. She had ordered a clone for herself, and six months later, once it was fully grown, Twilight and Liza had performed the transplant. After the surgery, Derpy had become Twilight's lover, and had placed an order for clones of herself and her youngest daughter (and sometimes lover) Dinky, for them to cook and eat. Soon after, Twilight had hit upon the idea of throwing a dinner party for their closest friends and family, and so had begun growing a few more clones. With a total of seven, she expected they'd have plenty for their meal.

Now, of course, it was time for the big day. Twilight had decanted the seven clones a few days ago, and she, Derpy and their daughters had begun prep work almost immediately. All of the internal organs (sans hearts and lungs, to keep the clones alive until they were actually cooking) had been harvested, two had been soaking in a brine for almost a day now, and all of the other ingredients they needed had been chopped, mixed and otherwise prepared as appropriate. This would allow the actual cooking to start that morning with no delays.

Reluctantly, Twilight pulled away from Derpy and climbed out of bed. "Come on," she told the other woman. "The kitchen awaits."

Derpy, climbing out after her, smirked and made a mock bow. "I await your command, my lady."

"Lady this," Twilight told her as she wiggled her rump at the other woman.

Derpy's laughter could be heard down the hall, and through a closed bedroom door, prompting the room's occupant to sigh.

"I love my mother dearly," Amethyst Star grumbled to herself as she rolled out of bed. "But why does she have to be such a morning pony?"

~*~

A little while later, as she headed into the kitchen, she could see Twilight and Derpy bustling around, wearing nothing but their aprons, and smiled despite herself. "Morning, Mom. Morning, Twilight."

"Sparkler!" Derpy grinned. "So nice to see you could finally join us."

"Very funny, Mom." Amethyst rolled her eyes. "So, you two need any help?"

"You're just in time, actually," Twilight told her. "I need to get these two into the water so they can simmer, and I need you to watch them until they're about ready to come off the bone. That'll be about an hour and a half." She pointed to a couple of bodies. "I'll take that one, you get the other."

Amethyst shrugged. "You're the princess."

Twilight winced. "Please, Amethyst. We're practically family. You really don't have to call me that."

"Sorry. Force of habit."

"Well... break it, please?" Hoisting up one clone over her shoulder, she left the room, leaving Amethyst to take up the clone of Twilight herself. In the next room over, she set the clone into the large pot as Twilight adjusted the other, raising an eyebrow as she finally looked at the face.

"Say, isn't that your old marefriend?"

"Moondancer?" Twilight straightened herself out. "Yes, actually. She agreed to donate for our cloning vats even before she asked me to harvest her, so I can make as many meatgirl clones of her as I want. I only do it on special occasions though, like this one." Casting a bubble-head charm over both clones, she turned on the heat. "I'll be back in a couple of hours, Amethyst."

"See you then."

Leaving her marefriend's elder daughter to watch the pot, Twilight returned to the main kitchen, where Derpy was busy with the next clone. "Need me to hold her still?"

"Absolutely," Derpy told her. "I've just gotten to the tricky part."

Twilight nodded, and lifted the clone's head, opening its mouth and sticking her hand in. "Lift a little higher... okay, you're good. Push." She watched as Derpy pushed the spit forward along the spine of the clone's body, so as to avoid the heart and lungs. Finally, guided by Twilight's hand, it came through the spot where her esophagus had, until recently, connected to the mouth. Angling the head, Twilight watched as the spit came out, nodding in approval. "There. A little further through, and we can put the stabilizers on the arms and legs so she can go in the oven."

Smiling, Derpy did as she was told. Once the clone was secured to the spit, she lifted one end of the metal pole, Twilight taking the other, and carried it over to their oversized rotisserie oven, where the clone would rotate for the next few hours as she cooked. Once the two ends of the spit were secured, Twilight reached in to fondle the clone's rear one last time, then shut the door and turned on the heat. "There, she's ready."

Watching her clone slowly turning, Derpy looked at Twilight with a smile. "Three down, four to go. Starlight next?"

"Yep." Walking over to where the blank-eyed clone of Starlight Glimmer lay, Twilight gestured to the pitcher and basting brushes next to her. "Oil first."

Derpy nodded, and took up one of the brushes. Dipping it into the oil, she began coating the clone's bare skin, paying special attention to certain parts. Twilight, seeing this, smiled at her lover's actions, then went back to her own work. Between them, they soon had Starlight thoroughly covered in the oil. Derpy them stepped back to let Twilight telekinetically lift the clone onto the kitchen's griddle, a large, flat panel of metal, careful to keep her head away from it.

"We'll sear her this way," Twilight told Derpy over the hissing of the meat. "Then we let her set and rest for a bit. While she's resting, you can roll out the dough, and I'll start stuffing Liza."

"Right." Derpy watched in fascination for the next several minutes as Twilight carefully monitored Starlight, making sure to get every inch of her body cooked sufficiently, before setting her onto a cooling rack. Turning away, she pulled out the packages of dough they'd prepared the other day: a mixture of flour, salt, herbs, pepper, egg whites and water. Rolling several of the packages out into a single large sheet, she eyed the resting clone. "I'm glad we made so much of this," she muttered to herself. "We're going to need it."

Meanwhile, Twilight was hard at work on her own project: stuffing the brined clone of her adoptive daughter. Smiling as she looked down at the naked clone, she thrust her fingers into the bare cunt, and began working them around, spreading the opening until she could shove the first wad of stuffing inside.

After several minutes of this, Twilight had a large bed of stuffing along the back of the empty cavity. Now came one of her own, personal touches to the recipe. Taking an oval-shaped piece of stone she'd previously enchanted and laid nearby, she gently pushed it through the clone's cunt and into the main cavity, resting it on the bed of stuffing. After an adjustment or two, she was satisfied with its position and went back to shoving the mixture of bread, onion, egg and other seasonings into the clone's body. Finally, she was done. Patting the rounded belly, she scooped up the meatgirl with her daughter's face and set it into the roasting pan, positioning it until it looked just right. One probe of her meat thermometer inserted, one bubble-head charm to protect the clone's head from heat damage, another spell to activate the heating stone she'd inserted (to help cook the stuffing from within) and one lid later, she slid the pan into the oven, closed the door and set the readout on her probe thermometer. "All set!" she announced as she walked over to the resting Starlight clone. "Derpy, is that dough ready?"

"And waiting," Derpy told her.

Twilight nodded in satisfaction, and lifted the clone onto the middle of the dough. Working carefully, the two women wrapped the excess around the clone's body, and then used the extra pieces Derpy had set aside to wrap the arms and legs as well. Once Starlight's clone was thoroughly sealed within the dough, Twilight lifted her into another pan and once again cast the bubble-head spell, before she and Derpy slid the pan into another oven.

"Now, we get to the complicated one," Twilight said as she pointed to the sixth clone. "We're going to spit her tight little butt, just like we did your clone. Except for this one, we're going to stuff her afterward and cook her over the coals for a while, then finish her in the steamer."

Derpy shook her head. "Where you came up with that recipe, I will never know," she told her lover. "But my little Sparkler should taste wonderful when she's done."

Twilight laughed. "She will, trust me. This isn't the first time I've used this method to cook a clone."

"Oh?"

Twilight nodded. "Trixie and I cooked one of her clones this way for her wedding reception, and everypony there agreed that she was absolutely delicious."

"I see." Derpy smiled. "Well, let's do it."

She walked over to the counter where the clone of Amethyst was waiting, and adjusted her until she was laying on her front, giving them access to her tight rear. Twilight took the spit and began pushing it in, moving as carefully as Derpy had when she'd spitted her own clone earlier. Derpy, for her part, held the clone's mouth open for the spit to come out, and then turned the clone over. "Let me do the stuffing this time, okay?"

"Okay." Twilight stepped back, giving Derpy ample room to work as she took handfuls of stuffing and shoved them in through the clone's cunt. Once it was all done, she tied the clone's arms and legs into position on the spit, brushed her with oil, and set her into the open rotisserie that Twilight had installed in the kitchen fireplace. Pressing a switch, she stood back, arm around her lover, as they watched the clone rotating.

"Think we should get Liza and Dinky in here to watch over things while we have a little fun?" Twilight asked.

"I wouldn't mind in the slightest." Derpy cocked her head. "Say, where are they, anyway?"

Twilight shrugged. "Knowing Liza, they're hooked up to a couple of the girls in the Brain Room."

"Of course."

~*~

About forty-five minutes later, Twilight and Derpy returned to the kitchen, satisfied smiles on their faces.

"Momma!" Dinky jumped up from where she'd been sitting, and laughed as she glomped the older woman. "Just in time!"

Twilight smiled as the two embraced, then turned to her own daughter. "And how are you doing?"

"Both of me are doing good," Liza told her with a grin. "I have a lovely marefriend, a wonderful mother, and my clone's temperature is right where it should be, both inside and out."

"That's very good," Twilight told her. "So... you want to help me with the next stage of cooking?"

Liza grinned. "You got it. The pan's right here."

"Then we're all set." Twilight checked the clone rotating in the fireplace, her meat at just the right shade. "Perfect. Help me get her onto the counter."

Extinguishing the fire, they concentrated together to lift the clone into position. Twilight then watched as Liza focused, telekinetically pulling the spit from the clone's body and setting it aside. Grabbing the container of stuffing, she shoved the last of it into the open hole, then flipped the clone onto its back in the pan and positioned the arms and legs. Satisfied that her daughter knew what she was doing, Twilight went to check the other roasts. All were doing well, so she returned to Liza's side. The clone had been re-oiled and an apple stuffed in her mouth, to Twilight's amusement.

"Ready?"

Liza nodded. "Ready."

Lifting the pan up, they carried it over to the large, oven-sized steamer, and set it inside. Shutting the door and turning it on, Twilight looked at her daughter. "Now there's just one left to do. Did you dry off Dinky's clone like I told you?"

"We did. And we got her into the frying rig too," Liza reported, pointing to a service cart where a large metal... contraption sat. All in all, the rig resembled a large, round birdcage with five bars and a hanging loop at the top, and a bottom made of mesh. The clone, her wrists bound, sat cross-legged inside it. Looking more carefully, one could see a stabilizer that ran through her bottom, and a second into her cunt, keeping her in one place.

Twilight nodded in approval. "Is everything else set?"

Liza nodded. "The derrick is all assembled, we triple-checked the burner and the propane tank... all we need is to get the oil in the pot, and then the meat in the oil."

Twilight grinned, rubbing her hands together. "Excellent. Time to deep-fry."

"You are having way too much fun with this," Derpy told her, an amused smile on her face as she kept cuddling her younger daughter.

"I don't get to cook out like this very often," Twilight replied. "Indulge me."

Derpy raised her eyebrows with a smirk. "I thought I did that before we came in here."

"Touché."

Liza, watching the back-and-forth, smiled. Ah, I love it when they get this way... "I hate to interrupt, but we've got cooking to do."

"Right." Twilight moved to the cart and pointed it at the door. "I'll take the meat, you get the oil."

Liza nodded, and snagged up the jug, following her mother and the clone of her marefriend outside.

Just outside the castle, there was a small, flat and grassy closed-off area. Liza and Dinky had set a very large burner on the ground, a closed pot on top of it, and a very tall ladder with a hanging swivel pulley and a couple of other attachments sat nearby. There was also a chair, about ten feet away from the burner, and they set the cart next to this. Moving over to the pot and taking its lid off, Liza poured the oil in, then set the jug aside and moved the ladder over the pot. "Hook her up, Mom."

Twilight inspected the ladder, and nodded before lifting the rig with Dinky's clone into place. Attaching its hanging loop to the swivel pulley in the middle, she tested it one more time before turning on the heat, and set the bubble-head charm over the clone's head.

In just a few minutes, the oil was up to temperature, and Twilight carefully untied the cord from the side of the ladder. Holding tightly, she gradually lowered the frying rig into the hot oil. Once the rig was just off the bottom, yet still completely submerged, she tied it off again. "Now, you need to stay here and watch this," she told Liza. "Keep an eye on the temperature. When it gets hot enough, you know what to do, right?"

"And everything else afterward. See you in an hour, Mom."

"Good girl." Twilight patted her rear, then headed back inside. Liza watched her go, then turned to the pot. "Looks like it's just you and me," she told it. "And..." Walking over to her chair and taking something from a lower level of the cart, she held it up. "My book."

Settling in to read, she waited for the pot's attached thermometer and its timer to beep.

~*~

Back in the kitchen, Twilight smiled at Derpy and Dinky. "Meat's in the pot," she told them. "And I think it's about time to check the other one. Dinky and I will handle that. Derpy, you and Amethyst can bring in the other ingredients."

"Will do!" Derpy saluted, then turned to the fridge. "Now, where did I put that container..."

While she was looking, Twilight and Dinky went into the next room, where Amethyst was waiting. "Good timing," she told them. "I think the meat's ready."

"Thank you, Amethyst," Twilight told her. "We'll take it from here, but you can help your mother bring in the other ingredients."

"Gotcha." Amethyst walked out, leaving Twilight and Dinky to check the pot.

"They look done to me," Twilight told the smaller girl. "Let's get those heads off first." Concentrating on the bubble-head spell, she triggered its secondary function. With a loud snap, the first bubble lifted away from the pot, leaving the body to sink into the water. A second snap, and the second bubble did the same. Gesturing, Twilight sent the two bubbles to rest on a table, then turned back to the pot.

Using their telekinesis, Twilight and Dinky spent the next several minutes separating the bones and meat. The long simmer had softened the meat considerably, making this an easy task, and the two finished right about the time Derpy and Amethyst came in, lugging two large containers. Pouring the chopped vegetables and seasonings from the first into the pot, the four stood back to watch it come to a simmer again, Twilight stirring occasionally. Finally, she looked satisfied. "Perfect timing. In ten minutes we'll add the noodles," she told them. "Fifteen minutes after that, we can turn off the heat and put on the preserver spell so this will stay at just the right temperature to serve. Then we can start getting everything else out of the ovens so it can rest for a bit. Then we have half an hour to clean up before the our friends arrive and we can start serving."

The others nodded, and went to work.

***
To be continued...

Next time around: The guests arrive, the meal is served (complete with the preserved heads as centerpieces), and the resulting dinner conversation includes a few in-universe explanations, such as when Derpy and her daughters moved in with Twilight, and just why Amethyst is sometimes referred to as "Sparker".