Fey woke up very warm, very moist and very tired. Everywhere she looked seemed to be dark pink, which initially threw her before she remembered where she was, and who she was inside. She was lying, appropriately enough, in the fetus position, inside the womb of a human. A heartbeat pulsed steadily, sounding strong yet gentle all the same. It was technically not the first time she had been this far inside another living creature, but Fey chose not to count her encounter with a hungry Alsatian. That wasn’t anywhere near as pleasant as her little nap had proven to be. Still, she was in here for a reason, right? She had infiltrated Tim’s girlfriend. Now came step two, and Fey would have begun it right away had she remembered what it was.


But try as she might, Fey couldn’t quite recall what her master plan was. Going inside was fine, and she could see step 3 clearly: “Awesome sex with the humans.” But step 2 was eluding her. She yawned, and stretched out her arms and legs, still feeling very tired. She was sure it would all come back to her soon. Perhaps she should sleep on it a little. It was so cosy in here…then she shook her head, waking herself up somewhat. No. She had a job to do. She had to make Tim happy, on her honour as a fairy, and that didn’t involve sleeping like a baby, so to speak. If she couldn’t remember what was surely a well thought out plan of action, then she would just improvise one, and that might well involve getting out of this incredibly comfortable hidey-hole.

Fey gently walked over to the entrance to Alex’s womb. The wet, rubbery surface squelched under her bare feet as she moved to the cervix. She wasn’t entirely set on leaving Alex completely right now, but she wanted to at least know where she was-was she still in Tim’s apartment, or elsewhere? Getting out would surely be easier than getting in, imagined Fey. So she slipped a hand inside the hole and spread it, her second arm soon joining in, until a hole big enough for her small upper body was made. She started to climb out, and was just past her chest when her host stirred. Fey froze, and inadvertently stopped pushing her arms apart. The cervix retracted back to its normal size, pinning her arms against her body and trapping her.

“Oh, sugar! I’m stuck!” squealed the wiggling fairy, forgetting herself for a moment. Then her eyes bulged and she froze once again as she felt her host jolt slightly.

“W…who was that?” came a voice, very audibly to little Fey even inside her fleshy prison. She stayed silent, thinking that she had properly goofed this one up, before thinking of a plan. Well, she had said she would improvise, so now was the time.

“I…it was me…” she said, as serenely as she could manage given the circumstances. Again she felt Alex’s body shift, as if she was looking around. “No, you will not see me, Alex. I come…from within.”

“F-From within?” asked the human. “Yeah…yeah, you’re right. What’s going on? I feel something… Oh god am I going crazy? I knew those nachos from last night were no good!”

“No, no, you are not crazy, Alex. I…am the voice of your own femininity. I have decided to give you advice, about doing things that you may ordinarily-“

“Are you my womb?!”

“…I am your very womanhood, given form and voice, to guide you on-“

“My womb is talking to me.”

“N-No, I am a personification of your innate-“

“Oh man I need to see this, hold on”

There was a sudden lurch, and Fey had to suppress a yelp as she felt Alex move a short distance.

“What are you doing, Alex? I have important things to tell you, and-“

“I’m just gonna have a quick peak. I’ve got this mental image of my cervix opening and closing like a mouth? I mean I can’t not check to see if that’s happening, I’m sure you understand.” Fey, facing down towards Alex’s opening, could see light appear. She was going to be caught! She struggled, and she suddenly felt her wings free themselves. With all of her might she flapped those wings until she felt herself start to move forward. Yes! Freedom! Slowly, fey inched herself down the vagina towards the light. She was nearly out when she ran headfirst into some probing fingers, which grabbed her head tightly.
“What the hell?”

Fey tried to word some sort of excuse when Alex pulled back hard. Fey felt her neck strain as she was carried further out, and it only just now occurred to her, as her spine started to crack, that she was still stuck in the cervix. As she emerged, she took the rest of Alex’s womb with her into the fresh air, dragged up towards Alex’s head. The human, perhaps just in shock from what she was feeling and seeing, simply continued to pull upwards, as if trying desperately to dislodge the foreign body from her most sacred of places.

She only partially succeeded. With a wet tear, Alex ripped the head and spine of the fairy out, leaving a tiny limp body hanging out of a prolapsed birth canal. Finally letting go as she did so, the head and spine flew up nearly in a vertical line before coming back down again. By chance it landed right inbetween the human’s considerably cleavage. Fey’s head looked up into wide, blue eyes. She giggled nervously.

“Uh…hi.”

Alex fainted.

=========================================================================================================

Tim swore as he rooted through cupboards in his kitchen, sweating slightly. He knocked aside old cans and forgotten products, peering inside, before slamming the doors shut.

“Damnit!” he said to himself, exhaling like an angry bull. Where was she? He hadn’t panicked when she hadn’t appeared straight away after Alex left in the morning. He hadn’t panicked when she still didn’t come out after he asked her to. But now he was worried. What if she had run away? He had been hard on her recently. Maybe she had just had enough. He sighed, shaking his head as he thought of where he could possibly look next.

He was halfway through rummaging a drawer full of cutlery and utensils when he heard a small, yet unbelievably smug laugh coming from the kitchen window. He stopped and smiled. So much for that-just more games. Well, he was going to show her what for. He turned around.

“Very funny, Fey-oh?”


There wasn’t a fairy in front of him. It was three fairies.

The shortest one, smaller and thinner than even Fey, was wearing what looked suspiciously like a wizard’s cap, although the wizened effect was tarnished slightly by the rest of her outfit, which was basically just a bikini. She had extremely long black hair, and stood with her arms crossed behind her back, smiling deviously-Tim figured it was her who had laughed. One, looking more like Fey complete with blonde hair, held a bow in her hand, and was dressed in slightly more sensible leather armour, a quiver of tiny arrows on her back. She stood slightly behind her companions, straight as a proverbial arrow and with a sober expression on a noble face.

Between them stood a larger fairy, maybe a good 2 inches taller, who wore a chest plate over silky clothes. Auburn hair flowed onto her shoulders, and her features radiated passion. A silver sword gleamed in her hand. She pointed dramatically at Tim.

“Human!”

“…uh…what is this.”

“WE are the RETREIVERS! The best field agents in all fairy-kind!” said the swords-fairy, who twirled her blade with an admittedly impressive flourish.
“We are here to retrieve the fairy known as Fey.” Said the archer, her neutral expression never shifting.

“So play nice, and give her up, and we might just go easy on you.” Smirked the wizard, giggling again.

Tim stared at the three fairies, hand stealthily retreating from the drawer. Then he stared at them some more. He kept this up till the leader of the terrible trio coughed nervously.

“Ah, paralyzed with fear, eh?” she managed, recovering the momentum well. She stepped forward, brandishing her blade and pointing it at Tim. “I can’t blame you. Countless foes have fallen to us. The dreaded eight legged beast of the forest. The direrat of the sewers. The fearsome striped dragonbug.” She grinned up at Tim, walking forwards atop the kitchen counter, still pointing her sword at him. “Shall we add your name to the list, human?”

Tim casually swiped his arm forward, casually slicing the fairy in half with a pizza cutter. Her upper half went flying back towards the two standing fairies, catching the ranger and sending them both tumbling out of the window. The smaller fairy looked up at him, shocked, as Tim daintily picked up the lower half and tossed it out the window like a banana skin.

“Don’t break into people’s houses and threaten them.” He said. The little fairy snarled at him.

“D-Don’t think you’ve seen the last of us! The Retrievers are not defeated so easily! We’ll rescue our comrade!”
“She’s not here, dummy. I thought she went back to you guys.”


“Hah! Your lies don’t fool me. We will return, human!”

Tim went to slice at her with his pizza cutter, but before he could reach her she had disappeared in a flash of white light. He went over to the window and looked down. He could see a few red smudges where the 1 and two halves and landed, but soon they too disappeared in a flash of light. He frowned, then shrugged. He had a fairy to find.

As he walked out of the kitchen, his phone started to vibrate. It was a call from Alex.

==============================================

I had a lot of fun writing this chapter.

Also: I've been playing a shitton of Overwatch and damn if I don't want to write a fic about the lady who specializes in impossible medical technology and the cast of attractive female characters.