Boutique Business Sacrifice

I am Mika. I am 12 and my hair is brown. I have mum, dad, both grandmas, only one grandpa, younger brother and some good friends. I live with my parents and my brother. I like clay modelling and hanging out with my friends. I like modern pop, house and electro. I want to be a clothes designer or something. I am a happy but a clumsy girl. Or should I say I ‘was’? I never thought I’d be an unlucky girl too. And right now I am talking to myself in my thoughts.

An amazing boutique had opened not far away, so I had decided to go there with my friends. I wore a blue t-shirt, jean shorts and a pony tail. I didn’t wear much make up. I took my purse. I finished my homework in a hurry and then my parents dropped me off in the city, where I was supposed to meet my friends. We did all sorts of things in the city, so there wasn’t much time or money left when we got to the boutique. It was inside a huge shopping mall building. It really looked amazing! The boutique was huge, with all sorts and styles of clothes!

We didn’t get to buy anything though. We didn’t have enough money left. Or more correctly, they didn’t, and I didn’t want it to rub it into their faces, so I didn’t buy anything either. But their parents would pick them up at 7 PM, and mine would pick me at 8… So I figured, after they’re gone, I’d go back and buy myself a really nice ribbon. When I went back there, I saw some really nice gloves hanging. ‘I hope there will be some left next time…’ I thought. The ribbon costed just as much as the gloves did, and I didn’t have money for both. And I didn’t want to buy a normal cheap ribbon… I really liked that one ribbon. So I took the ribbon and decided to buy the gloves next time I was there.

So, I paid up and tried to leave the shop. Except that the alarm sounded when I approached the sensor. The shopping lady told me that it happens sometimes, so I stepped back and tried to pass through the sensor again. It sounded again. There is always a possibility of a broken sensor, but they said they should probably search my stuff so they can let me go without worry.

But the shop manager got there before they could do that. She said I had gloves in my purse. I looked at it – it was ON my purse, perfectly camouflaged. ‘Oh God, one must have accidentally fell on my purse while I was looking at them…’ I thought.

“Should I call the police, young lady?” The manager asked.
“Uhh, it was not on purpose! I swear! Those gloves had been hanging and they must have fell on my purse…”
“Yes, of course it was an accident! If I was a thief, I would say the same!”
“But it really was… You don’t believe me?”
“If it was really an accident, you should have been more careful. But no, I don’t believe you. The camouflage was almost perfect, it couldn’t have been a coincidence. It should have at least fell off your purse by now…”
“This is bad…” I said quietly.
“But this is a perfect moment, young lady! We need someone quick. You do this for us, we let you go.”
“Yes!” I immediately accepted.

She took me to a room that looked like a photograph room. ‘Uhh… They will take pictures of me? Jeez… Why did I go on with this?”
“Excuse me, miss… what should I do exactly?”
“You’ll have to wear some clothes and model a bit. We were supposed to have an appointment with another girl your age, but she isn’t coming… It’s nothing hard or embarrassing. Just take these summer clothes and wear them. Wardrobe is over there.”

I went in the wardrobe and wore them. I was anxious the whole time. I thought ‘Modelling?? Me?? What if my parents see the pictures??’

I walked out of the wardrobe, wearing the right clothes. Those were beach clothes, not lewd, but still light. I felt really embarrassed.
“Umm… Miss, how long will this take?”
“Forever.” She answered with a light laugh. I took that as a joke.

So, she placed me on the stage and went behind the camera. She told me to lean on my left leg and put my arm on the back of my head as if I were scratching it.
“Put your elbow down. This needs to be a relaxed and a cute scene. And relax. Smile. That’s good, that’s very good!”

And then the camera flash blinked. And I didn’t. How foolish was I, my only concern back there was if I’d accidentally blink or not.

The lady then moved from the camera and went to what seemed to be her office, but… I couldn’t move. At all. I couldn’t even move my eyes or muscles of my face. I couldn’t even blink. I could only breathe, and that happened automatically, I had no control over it. I was in so much panic! Ever since that flash… I completely lost the ability to move! It was unbelievable! I screamed in my mind as loud as I could, but my throat didn’t make a sound.

Then she brought a man who seemed to be the owner of the boutique andshe also brought… some sort of a monk? Shaman? He looked like a dark priest, kind of like Anthony Levey, only more pagan. He quickly set up 5 candles around me and started a prayer:

“Oh lord Hwalu! The Great Lord Hwalu! The ONLY Lord Hwalu! You who won the ancient war between all Gods. You who had acted patiently and cunningly now enjoy power and eternal wealth, while all the other Gods had been slowly drowning in their greed and now suffer eternal defeat and worsening weakness.”

‘WHAT IS THIS???’ I thought in huge shock. ‘ARE THEY SACRIFICING ME TO A DEVIL?? TO SOME PAGAN GOD??’

“You have been trapping human souls by turning their flesh to non-living material. You had fed off of souls, and the soul is an eternal source of energy, you have fed off of their thoughts, fear, loneliness and despair. They would keep you strong even after everything is gone. You had been slowly and patiently trapping souls one by one, until you were strong enough to choke all the other Gods, and made them eternally weakening subordinates of yours. You made the wish of Buddha come true by preventing his reincarnation for all eternity.”

While he was chanting that, I panicked in my mind. ‘NO… ARE YOU CRAZY??’ Apparently, they were trying to turn me into an item or something. ‘That’s impossible… right? I feel stiff… So stiff…’ There was pressure all over my body. It got me so scared… Because it felt like I was seriously going to turn into something else. I could feel my tears raining down my cheeks. Apparently, only function I had left but breathing. The only functions I had left for the next 30 seconds…

“We offer you this child to be taken as your own statue, your own food, your own slave! In return, let these people use your new property in this shop until it is broken to ruins! Just as you give this girl eternal prison, give them life-long wealth and luck!”

And then… THAT is when the strange feeling really kicked in. I felt it. My skin was becoming different! I still remember it… My body numbing from outside to the inside. My tears stopped as if someone shut the valve. And when I realized I couldn’t breathe… that’s when I was truly worried I was going to die. That I was going to suffocate. My sight and hearing also faded away. I was in complete darkness and fear for several seconds.

Then my sight started coming back to me. But it wasn’t a normal sight… It felt like it came from the inside of my head, not my eyes. And I could hear again. Now that I think about it, I guess it was my soul that was hearing and seeing.

“I am convinced, my Great Messenger, but she still looks like a normal mannequin…” Asked the manager.
“She is the best mannequin you have, isn’t she? With ball joints at that.”
“Yes… I am not complaining, but… So let me confirm it. She’s going to attract a lot of customers or something…”
“No, you got it all wrong! The Great Hwalu will reward your shop in all sorts of ways for bringing this precious sacrifice to him through me. But since this is your best child mannequin, you may as well just use it. He doesn’t mind. It is HIS mannequin, no matter what you do with it or to it, and there is no other mannequin like that in this building. He is the only god that’s left and he doesn’t need to prove his things are his.”

“That’s OK.” Said the male store owner. “My friend here knows what he’s doing. Let’s give him the money and close up.”

I was dazed. ‘WHAT?? I’M A MANNEQUIN??? IT’S IMPOSSIBLE!!! DID IT ACTUALLY HAPPEN???’ I couldn’t believe it. ‘I must be dreaming… I can’t breathe… Maybe something is choking me in my sleep so I’m having this nightmare. Please wake me up!!! I’ll die!!!”

But I was not dying. It was all real. Very real. My body was numb. Completely static, all of it, inside and out. I could FEEL it being static and plastic. It was way worse than the effect of that paralyzing flash. Although numb, I could feel them holding me while taking me to the storage. The feeling was numb-ish. But it was not the worst thing. They took off my head and my limbs so they would take me there more easily. Taking them off felt like another numb-ish touch, but… I could feel myself being disarranged. It was so frustrating. And numb. I could feel them carrying my plastic body parts and… It was numb-ish, but I felt their hands and skin on my arms, my hips, my head… They acted as if I was a doll without feelings of shame. It felt so humiliating and disturbing, feeling their touch on my body.

And my sight… Oh it was not that much of a mercy at all. I couldn’t move whatever eyes I used for seeing then. I was constantly looking at only one point, not blinking, not shivering at all. It was only strange in the beginning, but it later felt like my real eyes were paralyzed.

They attached my head and limbs back on me before throwing me in the dark storage. It was pitch black because there was no window. It was so scary. I screamed and cried so much in my mind. My right foot was touching my left leg. It would normally be an OK thing, but in this situation it just reminded me of how pathetic I was. I was trying to concentrate to somehow move it, but it was futile. I was so scared… Not only because I was completely motionless, but because I was motionless in dark… I’ve always been afraid of the dark.

I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t need to, at all, but it had me frustrated a lot… I was completely new to that. I felt all mental symptoms of panic, except that the inside of my body was air and unmoving plastic. I couldn’t see the time because it was pitch black and… honestly, I didn’t even hear a clock ticking, so there was probably no clock. I didn’t sleep. I couldn’t and I didn’t need to. I was crying inside my mind for the whole night. I was hoping morning would come as soon as possible.

When it finally came and they opened the storage, they turned on the lights. I realized there were several other mannequins in the storage with me. Manager came there first, with store owner, for some reason. Why do I say ‘for some reason’? You’re thinking they were going to check out if everything was OK, but that wasn’t the case. They didn’t even recognize me!

“What is with this mannequin?”
“We got them 2 days ago, perhaps we didn’t memorize this one.”
“Strange, it is the best one we have… Yup, it has the company mark right here, it’s the one that we ordered. They might have sent us the wrong model, who knows how much these cost.”
“Don’t tell them. We’ll use this one.”
“I wasn’t going to tell them.”

Their conversation went somewhat like that. It was very confusing. I thought they were just trying to play a role for no one to find out about what their horrible deed. I cried, begged and cursed so much… But only in my mind. I saw myself in the mirror by accident. ‘That… That isn’t me… No… I couldn’t have become that… I cannot be just some simple dead plastic!!!’ I was seeing a typical plastic mannequin. I could recognize my face although it was not detailed at all. I had no nipples or genitalia. Now when I think better, I actually was the best mannequin they had. Not only the best child mannequin, but the best mannequin make it seemed. But still just a plain mannequin. Oh, and they said I had the mark of the company they ordered from. How messed up. I was OFFICIALLY a supposed-to-be-manufactured mannequin.

They put some clothes on me and set me up inside the boutique, several meters behind the sliding doors. I was not in the store front, but EVERYBODY could see me from the outside. Nobody recognized me. Nobody. Even police officers. They were all looking at me, at the clothes I had, they were touching the clothes, and they were touching my ‘wonderful’ plastic surface (some people are really impressed by perfection of mannequins). Day after day store employees would undress me and dress me again. It was so creepy! Unfamiliar people, their hands making physical contact in places only close friends should… but also treating me like a thing!!! Carrying me, dismembering me, carrying my arms, head, waist (with legs), and torso! ‘I am a little girl! Please see it! It is impossible!!! How can I be so helpless???’

The days were passing… Nobody was looking for me. Nobody recognized me. The only thing that kept me from boredom was panic and begging inside my mind ‘Please notice me!!! Please!!! I am Mika, the girl that is missing!!!’

Then one day my mother came to buy some clothes. I was so happy to see her! I thought she would recognize me and help investigation! But even when she was looking at my clothes close-up, she didn’t seem to recognize me.

“Can I help you somehow?” An employee asked.
“Don’t worry. I am just waiting for someone.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. It seemed to me like you were buying clothes for a teenage girl.”
“Oh, I always wanted to have a little kid.”

Even my mind had no words at that point. My mum… She completely forgot about me. Actually, no one ever came asking for me. Then I remembered the morning those 2 were confused about seeing me… They really forgot about me. They had a little teenage girl paralyzed and turned into a living mannequin. Doomed for all eternity. That is the worst deed anyone could do to anyone. Something even a psycho couldn’t live with. Yet the world just kept moving as if I had never even existed. The world suddenly and completely forgot about me…

They would dress me day after day. They would move me every week. They would sometimes take off my arms and legs, for example to move me above tables full of clothes I should represent. Being without arms and bottom waist was the worst. I felt so exposed with all these people looking at me with no limbs. Even though I felt my limbs laying in the storage room. And even when I had them on, I wasn’t able to do anything. I was in so much despair. I was sad and afraid that no one would ever save me. All my emotions, I felt them in my soul like I always would, except that my body was fully static plastic, and emptiness filled with air to make me lighter.

I craved to be heard by shoppers. I would repeat pleads in my mind whenever I saw somebody. I shouldn’t have. I should have enjoyed every movement, every look and every touch. It was the best thing in my life simply because it was the only thing in my life. Especially when I would see my friends… Growing up… Growing older…

Anyway, I should have cherished every move and sound. Because now it’s different. After many years, one or two hundred I think… fewer people started coming. And a month from that, when I was in the same place I was the very first day, I heard multiple explosions from really far away and the building shook. The boutique was partially destroyed. I was hit by deribs or something, so my head might be cracked, but I guess it doesn’t matter. Nothing had ever moved again in the building. Power was out. The only light left was some self-sustaining lamp. An eternally glowing lamp that was extremely weak, only useful because it made everything look like night time instead of pitch black. Why did they even buy that? There were no windows in that part of the building, so there was no sunlight at all. Clocks all stopped working. A long time has passed – humanity is probably dead. But what do I know? It’s not like I’m up to date with the news. What if they’re not all dead? That’s great! I’d be used somewhere again, and I’d see people moving and talking again!!! But no… Too long has passed. No one is coming.

I am wearing some blue t-shirt if I remember correctly. My arms and waist (with legs) are in the storage room. Looks like I’m never getting them back. I feel so exposed without my limbs, even after so long. I am staring at the closed sliding doors, and in the corner of my eyes are female T-shirts. I guess it’s a better sight than being buried in ruins, which is my ultimate fate. But it still feels awful, not being able to look around. I wish there was a working clock around to amuse me with its ticking. Because there are no changes in light and sound at all (no windows).

Do you remember the feeling of anticipation while looking at the clock in the class, waiting for class to be over? Well, let me tell you how stupid that is. In my case, time doesn’t even matter. I am here for an eternity. And eternity is infinite. A minute or an hour – it doesn’t matter, because there’s an infinite amount of them available for me. Hwalu is ‘eternal’ and the ‘only god’ that was not rendered powerless. And these trapped human souls is the only thing he needs. That’s what the dark priest said. And since he turned me into a mannequin so easily, I guess he knew what he was saying. And Hwalu even made everyone forget about me, even my own mum. So yeah, witnessing such power, I guess I can stop hoping and assume the priest was completely right. I called out for Hwalu many times, begging, but I haven’t even felt him.

I shouldn’t have just now thought about the fact that I’m here forever. Even now it gets me very scared and sad. So, I was 12 years old, and already went to hell. Isn’t that ironic? As the matter of fact, the dark priest said Hwalu prevented Buddha from reincarnating, so… Other people get to reincarnate??? Hah!!! I am so, so, so unlucky!!! One of the few that go to actual hell while everyone else is reborn. I didn’t deserve this, did I? Of course I didn’t. It doesn’t even matter. Nobody deserves eternal suffering, even if it’s just static half-numb hell.

How can anyone at all be afraid of death? Hwalu-sama, please, kill me. I will do anything you want. Just kill me, please…

I am so lonely…