Tsunade Fists Waifu Wars

Lauren-Genin, Chunin, and Jounin. These are the three levels that make up the Shinobi world. Yet there is one above this, more legend than fact, a title given to those who surpass the limits of humanity, those whose power rivals the 5 Kaga. These are the Legendary Sannin

Alice-There are only 3 Sannin. Jiraiya, Orochimaru, and Lady Tsunade

Lauren-55 years old, weighing in at 107 pounds, standing at 5 feet 3 inches, and carrying E cup breasts

Alice-Okay first of, how is she still so fucking hot if she's 55! Secondly how does she carry around those things without serious back problems?

Lauren-Ninja Magic Alice. Ninja Magic

Alice-Well oooooooookay then

Lauren-Well to be more precise, medical Ninjutsu. Using this she can greatly increase her cell regeneration, giving her a far more youthful appearance

Alice-So it’s like all those green tea extract things I see on infomercials, but it actually works!

Lauren-Oh, it's much more than that. She can also use it heal from wounds, or take the offensive with by affecting enemies on a cellular level. She can damage your organs, or even interfere with your nerve system so trying to move one body part will move a different one

Alice-Like being confused in a video game!

Lauren-Exactly. However, medical Ninjutsu is not her main method of combat

Alice-She punches shit real good!

Lauren-*Adjusts glasses explanatively* It's more accurate to say that she infuses her limbs with Chakra

Alice-...which allows her to punch shit real good! She can easily shatter giant boulders, and can send a grown man flying with ease!

Lauren-She’s one of the Naruto Universes heaviest physical hitters in right behind characters like Rock Lee, Might Guy, and her apprentice Sakura

Alice-If being an eternally hot granny with giant titts who can punch things really well isn't enough, she's got a super form!

Lauren-You see Tsundes stores a little bit of Chakra she generates everyday in a seal in a seal for a great deal of time. She can unlock this seal to gain enhanced...well everything, and a nifty healing factor to top it all off. This technique is called the Yin Seal: Release

Alice-With all these abilities, and skills she's managed to pull of some pretty impressive shit

Lauren-Like that time she survived an encounter with Madara Uchiha alongside the other 4 Kage

Alice-That might not sound impressive sense she only managed to survive, and she had the help of 4 ninja presidents, but once you remember that Madara is basically undead, evil, ninja Jesus, yeah that's pretty impressive

Lauren-She even managed to shatter his Susanoo with her strength

Alice-And notice how the bitch that we all call Lauren said the other 4 Kage. That's right! Tsunade became the ninja president of the Hidden Leaf, the Hokage. Finally, a woman in office!

Lauren-However she does have a few minor flaws. Manly her Chakra

Alice-Catra!

Lauren-She’s completely dependent on it. Without, she's just another old lady

Alice-Plus the fact that she lacks Ninjutsu, And Genjutsu kinda sucks

Lauren-But when you've gained the title of Sannin, that hardly matters