Squunch sat in his castle, as it floated gently above the clouds. He looked at the spreadsheet of potential characters he had amassed and sighed. What the fuck was he playing at? Shouldn't he just be writing more splatter instead of dicking around with plotlines and character development? What does personality matter when your intestines are squirting from your ears?

And people were suggesting normie story lines again. And machines! Squunch tried not to be too insulted that Sol had suggested a machine for her character. Why didn't she just go the whole hog, and suggest the plot too, then write the whole damn story. Then Squunch could happily beat his own brains out with his keyboard, safe in the knowledge that the world didn't need him anymore. It was pretty clear that she would be more than capable of writing stuff, probably better than Squunch even, if only she wasn't being tied up all the time.

But what was worse, the 'Iron Maiden of Blending' was a brilliant invention. "Just imagine…" as Kasia would say. Squunch got a boner everytime he thought of that half-Chinese girl's innards being turned into screams and squirted all over chapter 16. So the IMoB and it's victim would have to stay.

But now Sol had gone a step too far, calling for slaughter of his beloved Kasia in the hot-tub. The story's central character! She might name herself after the Goddess of the Sun, but she wouldn't be the boss of this story. Time to set the record straight, and get back to work. tappity-tappity-tap.