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Loke
2019/07/12
(Fri)
23:35:32
No.
16807
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I like how you did the exposition in this chapter, having us see things from Chloe's perspective and giving us her thoughts instead of just explaining it directly. We also know a little about the girls and why they're there from the earlier chapters, and it's nice that you trust the reader to remember this instead of spoon-feeding us the boring (but necessary) background info. The inclusion of the two younger, innocent, girls makes for some extra psychological torment for the others, and I'm really into that. Excited to see where you're going with the six other deaths, keep up the good work!
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