Thanks. I also have simpler stories but I prefer to post these a little bit more complex (instead of the usual stab stab stab).

Betrayal and extremely unjust deaths are key point in my stories, i love them. Betrayal particularly.

About the long death for Liz… I've thought about it but it didn't convince me at all. It is not a very reasoned story, it suddenly appeared to me and I stayed as close as possible to the initial idea. And, strange as it was, Toby was sincere and leaving her agonizing for hours was not in the character. I also thought about making him become more cynical, just another lover, but it didn't work for me (even if I could use a long and lonely death in a future story, the more I think about it the more it intrigues me)

You're right about pronouns but google translate and sleep betrayed me in the 2nd to last paragraph, usually I check it.