[humorous] [consensual] [penectomy]

Safety Film
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by ShamefulDesire 09/07/2021

This is the script for a safety film circulated by a nudist colony in the 70's. The film itself does not survive and may have been created many years prior, but eyewitnesses state that the film was shot and played back for audiences during the camp's lifetime. The film itself was silent and the script was read by someone standing next to the projection screen during orientation.

Scene: Introduction
Voice Over: Welcome to St John's nudist colony! Here we hope you will enjoy the freedom to be naked whilst offering your sweat and toil for the good of the community. This is an informational film to show the perils of working without any clothes on. We will demonstrate the need for the use of protective clothing at certain times, and during activities that may by dangerous.

Scene: Cutting down a tree
VO: Here we see Brian and Tommy using a two man saw to fell a great redwood tree. [pause]. See how they make light work of such a mammoth undertaking! It is however a hot day and the work is strenuous. Naturally, they have both developed erections from this exertion! [pause]. Oh dear! The blade of the saw seems to have caught their protrusions while they were concentrating on their work! This is most uncomfortable! They will need to seek medical attention right away! They will have to leave the tree for another day. This delay could have been avoided if the strapping young fellows had put on a loin cloth before commencement. The barn they were going to make will have to wait!

Scene: Chopping wood with Mary
VO: Here we see Bob using a hand axe to cut some old off cuts into firewood. Mary is helping out by collecting the various pieces that need to be cut and bringing them to him. What a comely figure she has! [pause]. I think Bob is distracted by Mary's handsome womanly bush! He's certainly showing all the signs! Oh no Mary don't bend over like that! Bob can't stay focused on what he is doing! Ahhh... Well that might quell Bob's thoughts on the subject! There will be an extra log on the fire this evening Bob, but I don't think Mary will be warming your bed tonight! It is always important to stay focused on your work. If you find yourself thinking about sexual congress while doing something potentially dangerous, perhaps you should take a break. Have a bit of tea to take your mind off of it. All of this could have been avoided with a cup of earl grey.

Scene: Kitchen work
VO: Samantha and Claire are working in the kitchen. Hello ladies! I see you're making carrot soup for lunch! How nutritious! I'm already salivating. Notice how the ladies are wearing panties so as not to get any of their pubic hair in the soup. Good thinking ladies! [pause]. Here comes Simon with some more carrots for the ladies to chop. The three of them often volunteer in the kitchen as they like to copulate together while the food is on the stove. Simon is obviously thinking about this activity! No Simon, the carrots aren't hiding your excitement. Just put them on the table for the ladies to cut. [pause]. Oh no! The ladies were too eager to chop the carrots! Poor Simon! I don't think he'll be invited into the kitchen tomorrow! Never mind, at least the soup will have a bit of extra protein today. This unfortunate turn of events could have been avoided if Simon had followed the example led by the ladies and put on a pair of underpants. Not only safe, but also sanitary for kitchen work! Perhaps Simon should find work making the barn the community is building.

Scene: Raising the barn
VO: We rejoin Brian and Tommy who have finally finished with the tree and have made a start with the barn. They are joined now by Harold and Stacey who have experience in hoisting up barns. [pause]. What an amazing example of team work! Many people working together to provide for everyone! People doing their bit for the community. Not a single thought of themselves! No selfishness here! [pause]. Ahh behold the barn has been raised and everyone is nailing the segments together as we speak. What a lot of noise! Many hands make light work! But what is this? Harold seems to be shouting and waiving his arms. Whatever could the matter be? Oh dear! His genitals were caught between two segments that have been nailed together! What a calamity! He won't be able to pull himself free, they're in there for good. Oh Stacey is here to help, she has a sharp knife in her tool belt to cut him loose. Good thinking Stacey! That's the kind of can-do spirit we admire here. Accidents can happen anywhere, and even to experienced members of the community. Luckily Stacey had the forethought to put on a tool belt at the start in order to spare poor Harold extra pain! Imagine if Harold had had to stay there while someone went to the kitchen to fetch a knife!

Scene: Epilogue
VO: This film was made by our brave volunteers Brian, Tommy, Bob, Simon and Harold. Here they are after been patched up by the medical staff who were on hand during filming. I hope they don't all miss their tallywhackers too much! Ha ha! We hope this film has been educational and that you will enjoy yourselves at St John's! Have a safe and pleasant stay!

-The End-