You have strange logic, as you know those cute girls do not need to be cooked if you don't want to :) there are other things to do with them.
Or you can do it in the cute harmless way :)
I have one such story in mind and I hope you will be still here when I will somehow manage to finish it :)

But anyway there is really no need for you to write something that much. You already tuned into something pretty famous and now I would consider you more like an inspiration for other people same as Edward Hyde was before.
So just having you around will be enough.