>>28273
Your welcome, it's shaping up to be a great story.

Just a bit of a disclaimer, this is just me going through my thoughts about the story / where it could go, not trying to tell you what to put in it. When I get into a book, show, or movie, I like to ramble on about it, but a story with this subject matter is harder to talk to people about. Write the story you want to write.

I'm interested in meeting Natalie's friends and their reaction to her transition to meatgirl. There is also the swim team and spelling club to deal with, though I'm sure there's not going to be any conflict involved with that. With her becoming a meatgirl, I assume there's no reason for her to go to school anymore, but I am interested on how school life in this world goes. We got a taste with Happy Ending but I am curious. Maybe something for another story.

I do think the Volunteers band might play a role later on. Stephanie might have connections to get a meet and great or something for her daughter. Hell, rich people have paid for private concerts before so who knows. I like Natalie being a metal fan and the band being Canadian is a interesting choice. I notice fictional metal bands tend to be from one of the Scandinavian countries, like Dethklok from Metalocalypse. I could be wrong though and the band is just their for lore or a seed for another story.

Same thing for the girls from the mall coming back into the story. They could be just a plot device for Natalie's shift to meatgirl and they could not show up again. That does lead me to the least believable part of the story. I can get behind the snuff/meatgirl/incest being accepted, and I know that a meatgirl obviously doesn't have pockets, but a 12 year old girl going out and not having her future equivalent for a cellphone with her is just weird. The again it is 300 years in the future so people having cellphones constantly on them could just be seen as a weird thing people in the past did.

I have some thoughts on the little bit of backstory we have for Stephanie but I want to wait until we have more info.