“So do you two want to go explore on your own?” Josh asked. “Call me if you see anything cool?”

“No,” Samantha slipped an arm through his, “let’s look together.” she smiled as Amelia did the same on the other side. “Much nicer! After all, we’ve got pretty much everything we came for so it’s not like we’re in any rush, is it? Unless, of course,” she added cheekily, “you two are impatient to get home for some reason?”

“No, no!” Josh assured her with a slightly awkward chuckle. “Whatever plans we have for this evening don’t impact this trip! Let’s take our time and have fun.” They walked the aisles together, looking at all the pretty displays that made the warehouse-esque building feel like a true Christmas wonderland. “Speak up if you see anything you want!” Josh smiled. “Like you said, it’s a big hall!”

“Ooh can we please have one of these?” Samantha gushed, letting go of his arm and rushing forward. What she had spotted was a domed projector which filled the space around it with falling snowflakes. Given how reasonably priced it was and the size of the space they needed to fill, Josh suggested getting two. Gleefully, the girls grabbed one each and then it was Josh’s turn to spot something exciting, something that made his inner child excited.

“Snow machines!” he gushed, picking up one of the boxes and reading the information on the side. “I always wanted one of these!”

“What is it, Daddy?” Samantha asked curiously. “Does it make real snow?”

“Well, not exactly.” he admitted. “It’s soap bubbles really, kinda like in the bath, but it sprays them out so it looks like it’s snowing! I think Mr Jenkins might kill actually kill us if we used it inside. Well, the rest of us, anyway!” she chuckled, winking at his daughter who giggled too, knowing that she would already be long dead by the time the caretaker saw what had been done to his floor. “But I think…” He studied the side of the box. “Yeah! It can be used outside too! We’ve got to get a couple of these!”

“Do you think we might need a cart?” Amelia suggested before offering to go fetch one. The others agreed and thanked her, Josh realising that this would now mean the seal had been broken and they would likely be filling that cart to the brim before they made it to the checkout! Hoping there was going to be enough room in the car, Josh began to inspect the 5l jugs of snow liquid, wondering how long each one would last for.

“You can make it snow on the grass outside!” Samantha grinned. “That will be run! Maybe we can put one by the front too, for when people arrive? If it hasn’t snowed for real, that is.” She gave a slightly wistful sigh, thinking how lovely it would be to have real snow for the occasion but knowing the likelihood was close to zero, and remembering that, while very pretty, heavy snow made travel difficult and may even put some people off coming to her party – that would be the last thing she wanted! “It’s just soap, right?”

“I think so.” Josh read the label carefully. “Just says here not to drink it and to to avoid getting the liquid directly on your skin. Doesn’t say anything about staining fabric.”

“Well that’s my plans for the afternoon ruined!” Samantha joked, starting to look around at the other packs of lights and special projectors on offer. “Maybe we could get some of these?” She picked up the display model of a cluster of candles made from real wax, three different sizes but moulded together as a solid piece and sculpted to look as if they had already been burning for a while, with drips running down the sides, fitted with battery-powered artificial flames that flickered like the real thing. “For the tables? Might be a nice touch?” Once again, Josh agreed and a few moments later Amelia returned with a trolley which they immediately started to fill. Three snow machines and three projectors went in first along with six jugs of the snow liquid, Josh arguing that it was not going to go off if they kept it until next year but that it would be annoying to run out part way through the party when all the shops would be closed.

As they walked on, they added various garlands of artificial foliage and plenty of tinsel to the trolley as well as the biggest boxes of fairy lights they could find.

“These are cute!” Samantha exclaimed, finding packets of chair-covers that looked like Santa hats. “Do you thing they’d fit the ones at the hall?” Josh checked the dimensions on the label and concluded that they would so five packs, totally twenty in all, were added to the cart. “Ooh what’s that?”

Around the end of the next aisle they saw a screened-off area that had its own curtain of pearlescent stars similar to the beaded curtain at the butcher but on a much larger scale. Beyond the curtain, it seemed much darker than the rest of the shop although the shelves themselves were lit up. The lighting and the twinkling curtain made it difficult to see what was inside this shop-within-a-shop but Josh quickly realised that was by design as he saw the large banner above the entrance which bore the words “On The Naughty List” and showed a rather busty woman reclining in a red bikini with white fur trim – technically no more revealing than an average swim-suit and family-friendly enough for a public billboard but clearly indicating what kinds of products one could expect to see within! If that had not been enough, large signs in red letters on a white background with a candy-stripe surround proclaimed the warning “Adult Novelties! Parental Discretion Strongly Advised!” Josh could not help chuckling to himself, wondering how many complaints it had taken for the signs to be added with the unmissable banner above apparently not being enough to tip some parents off!

“Come on, Daddy!” Samantha grabbed Josh’s arm again. “Let’s go take a look!”

“Oh well I…” Josh began but both girls turned on him with withering looks.

“Little bit late to worry about preserving my innocence now, Daddy!” Samantha reminded him pointedly, her free hand on her hip. “And you’re now pretty much contractually obliged to corrupt Amelia so you might as well get started now!”

“That’s true!” Amelia reminded him in a tone far sassier than she had ever used towards him up to that point. “Unless you were planning to drug me or get me drunk before you fuck me tonight so I won’t remember it? Because honestly that kinda sounds worse!”

“Okay! Okay!” Josh cautioned both girls, aware of how loudly they were talking, most likely on purpose, and of the strange looks some other shoppers were giving them. “We can go look! Just don’t make a scene, okay?”

“Thanks, Daddy!” Samantha stood up on tip-toes to kiss him on the cheek, suddenly all sweetness and light once more. “You’re the best!”

“You really are, Mr Martin!” agreed Amelia brightly, doing the same on the other side. Both girls giggled at how easy Josh was to manipulate as they pushed the trolley through the curtain and into part of the store that was definitely not intended for young children!

Lining the shelves were the kinds of festive novelties people took great delight in posting misidentified as children’s toys or regular decorations in charity shops, or giving anonymously in office “Secret Santa”s!

Despite recent developments, it was an amusing reminder of how young girl girls really were as they pointed and giggled at the vibrating candy canes, Christmas tree-shaped butt plugs, underwear with attached mistletoe and other seasonal naughtiness.

“What do you think, Daddy?” Samantha teased, holding a pair of snowman face nipple tassels up to her chest, the carrot noses sticking out protectively. “Or what about this?” swapped for them a pair of mince pie pasties.

“No, you should go for these ones!” Amelia laughed, spotting a set that were shaped like brussel sprouts cut in half. “You can wear these for the party!” Both girls giggled. “Oooh no, these are what you need!” She held up a part of panties with “Stuff me like a Turkey” written across the back. They continued to explore for a minute or so before Amelia’s eyes fell upon something she found genuinely intriguing. On a slim, headless mannequin was displayed a lingerie set consisting of red satin thong and a top which had a red velvet bra with white fur trim and sheer red fabric hanging down to just below the hip. “That’s so beautiful!” she sighed in awe, her eyes wide and sparkling like a Victorian urchin peering longingly through a sweet-shop window. She turned to Josh and grabbed his arm almost imploringly. “I wish I could wear it for you tonight!” Josh did not know what to say but his daughter sprung into action.

“Well what size is this one?” she asked, tugging at the back to look for a label. “This is an S.” Josh knew from internet shopping that this sizing meant that that set probably came from China where an adult “small” would only be suitable for a European fourteen or fifteen year old. With enthusiastic determination, Samantha began to rummage through the boxes in the basked beside the mannequin, all clearly labelled with their sizes. “Ah-ha!” she declared in triumph, holding on up, “XXS! Extra, extra small! That should do it!” Without even thinking to check with her dad she dropped the box into the cart. “Maybe I should get one of these for me and Mummy to enjoy together while we wait for you?” she giggled, picking up one of the vibrating candy canes.

“Go on!” Josh chuckled. “Chuck it in! But can we now go and look at the wholesome stuff again? Something about this whole room makes me feel dirty!”

“Amelia’s gonna make you feel dirty later!” Samantha teased, pulling back the curtain so that he could push the trolley out.

“I hope I look really pretty!” Amelia smiled up at him, linking arms with him once more and leaning her head against him.

“I know you will!” Josh stroked her hair then kissed the top of her head the way he often did with Samantha. His daughter did shoot them a rather curious look but, if she was feeling jealous, she did not say anything.

With the trolley growing ever fuller, they continued to explore the store until Samantha spotted what had to be the find of the day.

“Oh wow!” she gushed, running over to a display that Josh had not been paying a lot of attention to, not being that big a fan of pink and fluffy Christmas decorations! As far as he was concerned, the kinds of decorations on that particular section of wall belong in a Barbie Dream House, not on a Christmas tree. Besides, they were all little baubles and trinkets, far too small to have any impact in the hall they were planning on decorating. “Come look at these!” she urged him and he steered the trolley towards her, Amelia’s arm still through his own. “We have to get these for the stocking!” When he finally saw what she had found, he was inclined to agree!

On pegs next to each other were little pink cowboy hats just like the ones Sidney wore, a little bigger than might be expected to come with a Barbie doll, complete with silver beading around the brim and a glittering silver band, flocked to give them a felt-like texture, and matching boots, moulded together as a pair with tiny plastic diamonds embedded in the glitter-infused plastic.

“Everyone definitely needs a set of those!” Josh laughed. “Hope they have enough?” Fortunately, spread around the three foot wide and six foot high display were four facings of both products so they were easily able to collect twenty of each.

“We should probably head to the checkout!” Josh laughed. “Or I’m going to have to strap at least one of you to the roof for the drive home, or maybe have you ride along behind on roller skates!” The girls laughed as they followed him towards the front of the store.

“Oooh crackers!” Samantha practically bounced as they approached the checkout and saw the final displays of boxes piled high. “We definitely need those!” Josh looked a little nervously at the already full trolley but realised that, since there were typically either ten or twelve crackers per box, depending on the type, they would need four boxes at most, assuming the Samantha would want people to have fresh ones for the evening buffet as well as for the main roast dinner.

“Try to find some with something cool inside.” he instructed, manoeuvring the trolley so that it would not block the aisle, planning to stand with it while the girls chose. “Things people will actually want!” And so began the hunt for the crackers with the best prizes. Quickly and easily rejected were the ones with the tiny combs, brittle plastic jumping frogs and brightly coloured fake spiders. They also dismissed those where the prizes built up to some sort of game since these were more meant for a family sat around a normal table, not a room full of party guests. The ones with the spy equipment seemed a strong contender – invisible ink pens, keyring torches etc., as were the ones with simple magic tricks.

“I’ve found them!” Amelia announced loudly, apparently believing herself to have discovered the Holy Grail of crackers. The branding on them showed that they were related to the third Barbie movie which had come out two years earlier, meaning that they were probably old stock that had failed to sell over the previous two Christmasses but for Samantha’s party they were perfect! The box contained twelve crackers, six metallic pink with silver stars and six silver with pink stars. The picture on the back showed the six different prizes inside, two of each – plastic pencil toppers in the shape of hats and boots just like the decorations they had found, heart-shaped erasers, makeup mirrors made from pink plastic bedazzled with silver gems, fold-out pink hair-brushes and miniature manicure kids on little pink pouches.

“Oh wow! Those are perfect!” Samantha enthused, finding the two least-battered boxes to add to the cart. Short of Sidney’s producing their own crackers, she could not imagine anything more on-topic!

“What about the boys?” Amelia reminded her. “It’s all a bit girly?”

“Boys have hair and nails too!” Samantha giggled. “Don’t worry, we’ll find something more for them for the evening.” After ten minutes more of searching, they settled on the magic tricks collection and put two boxes of those, totally another twenty four crackers, into the trolley.

“Do you think we can check out now?” Josh laughed. “I think you girls are going to have to wait out front with the bags while I go fetch the car! Think you can manage that without being kidnapped?”

“Of course!” Samantha grinned. “We know there’s some weird people out there, Daddy! They might want to fuck us or even to cook and eat us! Can you imagine that?”

“Perish the thought!” chuckled Josh as he pushed the cart up to the waiting checkout and helped the girls unload their spoils.


To be continued...