Tuesday 7th May 2019

Had a lovely time with Martha yesterday afternoon. I have never had a mom so don’t exactly miss it but when I hang out with Martha I think that is what having a mom must feel like. Mrs Webber is very nice too and I think might be about the same age as Martha but she acts more like a friend or a big sister.

The show was great and the dinner was delicious. It was not a fancy place like the ones Daddy takes me to but it wasn’t like McDonalds or Wendy’s either. I think all restaurants should be like that where people can enjoy good, tasty food without having to be rich. I think if I planned on growing up and not getting eaten I might want to open a restaurant like that. Perhaps I can ask Daddy to open a restaurant where they serve girls like me. I wonder if enough girls would want that to make it work? Maybe girl-meat could be a special on the menu like Mrs Webber was joking? Still, we have to win the campaign first!

I was having a go on the rowing machine in the nude this morning when Martha came in. She said she was sorry and should have knocked but I said it was fine as she had already seen me at the photo-shoot anyway. She said that was why she had come and she wanted to show me the pictures. She said I could send them to Jessie if I wanted but not to anyone else and I had to tell Jessie not to share them. She said the posters were being made and would go to print on Friday. She said by Monday my pictures would be everywhere!

She gave me a thumb drive with the pictures on and I looked through them. I do look very cute in that outfit! I liked the nude ones best. The bikini made me look like a stripper, especially when I was only wearing the bottom half. I want to look like tasty meat, not like I’m supposed to be jumping out of someone’s birthday cake! I messaged Jessie and asked if I could send them and she said yes so I sent her the ones I liked best. She messaged back and said they made her want to eat me up and she couldn’t wait until her mum said she could take pictures like that too!

I went on the sites afterwards to see if there were any more comments and someone had commented on my nude videos asking where my sister had gone and if someone had eaten her up already! I was confused but then I remembered how alike Jessie and I look. We are about the same size and have the same shape face and our hair is the same colour except hers is curly. It is easy to see why people who don’t know us might have thought we were sisters. I wonder if people think that when we go out together?

I went for a swim after that. I will never wear my suit at home now unless we have guests over. I don’t want to be rude! Then I got dressed and went to find Martha to ask her about the website and the hunt for an office. She showed me the site with the pictures on now and said it will go live on Friday with the rest of the campaign. That is also when she will put the videos out. She said she and Daddy are going to look at some office spaces down town this afternoon and will tell me if they find something good.


Wednesday 8th May 2019

Daddy called me really excited yesterday afternoon and said they had a great office they want me to go see. He sent a car to pick me up and we drove down town to a part I sometimes walk to after school so I know it is not too far away from there. You can also see the top floors of Daddy’s hotel from there although it is a few blocks away. I thought we would go to an office building but instead the car stopped in front of an empty shop with white paint on the inside of the big front windows and Daddy and Martha came out to meet me, both looking really happy and excited like little kids on Christmas morning.

I said I thought they were looking for an office and Martha said they meant a campaign office like when someone is running for Mayor or for Congress. She said it was good to be a place where people would walk by and look in as the windows were free advertising and it would keep reminding people about my campaign. They took me inside to show me round.

It’s quite empty at the moment but as they described the plans I could picture it. They said they will put up boards to block off the front bit which is where most of the team will work sending out mail-drops, managing the social media, responding to enquiries and that sort of thing and it will be a place I can give press-conferences then behind the boards will be a more private area where Martha will work and she says I can hang out there too and maybe other people like Claude can have a desk there so it will sort of be in the same room as the main office but not as public.

At the back are two toilets and a cupboard for cleaning stuff and also a sink and counter where we can put a microwave and coffee machine. I said we should put one in the front too and a soda fridge and a couple of water-coolers. Martha said that was a nice idea. In one corner, off to the side of the bit they’re going to block off is a room that used to be the manager’s office and where they kept the cash safe when it was a shop. It has windows into the main area but with office blinds and you can lock the door. There is a small bathroom at the back of it that has its own shower too! Martha said this will be my office. (The whole office, not just the bathroom!)

I ask shouldn’t it be hers but she said it was my campaign and she was just there to help. She said I can kit it out however I want and it would be a good place to have meetings with people if I wanted to! It seems funny to think about me having meetings but I guess if I am going to be a celebrity then that’s something that will happen! I love how much effort everyone is putting into making my dream come true! The only thing that would make it better is if Jessie’s mom would come around already and let me share it all with her. I’m sure she will in the end.

I asked Daddy if he was going to lease the shop and he said it was easier to buy the whole block and rent the other units back to the people currently using them. That way we can make whatever changes we want. I asked what about after and he said the campaign is probably going to take a few years so not to worry. The realtor who was there said its already wired for fibre-optic broadband so that will be good. Daddy and Martha said it should be ready to move into by the end of the month at the latest so I should start thinking about what I want in my room!


Thursday 9th May

Major problem this morning! Someone at the printer called Martha and said I looked a lot like Wendy the mascot and asked if it was supposed to be a parody so Martha got worried and had the legal team look into it. They said I looked different enough that we would likely win a lawsuit but it would not be good publicity if it happened. They said my campaign was going to be very controversial at first, that means people are going to argue about it a lot, so it’s likely other brands will not want to risk being accidentally associated with me.

Martha told me we weren’t going to be able to use the pictures we had already and I asked what we were going to do. She said not to worry and she would sort something out. I am worried because they are due to be printing everything tomorrow! Martha put Claude in charge of working something out and took me down town to look at the office again. Daddy’s people move fast and Martha already had the key by what Daddy calls close of play yesterday although there is still some paperwork that needs to be done. It was nice being able to just walk around and imagine what it will look like when it’s full. Martha and I sat on the floor in my room and we looked at office furniture on her phone. I ordered a desk and a book made of brown wood and metal and a red leather sofa and two big black chairs like the ones on Shark Tank. Martha said it would be okay so I ordered a rowing machine, treadmill and spinning bike too and Martha said we should have some cupboards so ordered a big metal one and a filing cabinet in black. She said when she orders the computers for the rest of the office she will order me a good one too but she would be doing a bulk order for those. I can’t believe I’m going to have my own office!

After that we went to Wendy’s for lunch and I had my favourite double Baconator burger and a strawberry Frostie. While were were there Claude rang and said he had found a solution and was having the costume flown from Nashville and it would be here in four hours so we could do another shoot. I asked if we were going back to the farm but Martha said we should do it in one of the conference rooms of the hotel and use a green screen so we could control the light better. Claude said he wanted the costume to be a surprise and that the hair and makeup people would be at the hotel to meet us.

Martha said there was a lot of work to do so we went to the hotel and I came up to the apartment while she gets everything ready. I might go use the gym and have a swim before she comes to get me or see if Mrs Webber is about. Can’t wait to see what my new costume will be like! I hope is is as cute as the other one!


Friday 10th May 2019

I was going to write more last night but was too tired. Mrs Webber was busy helping the photographers turn one of the conference rooms into a studio so I went swimming then came back up to the apartment and had a shower and washed my hair then lay on the bed with nothing on and watched TV until Martha came up with the hair and makeup team. She looked very happy and was carrying two white boxes which she put on the bed.

The boxes had a logo on them from a company in Nashville. One was round like a drum and the other like a big shoe box. She opened the shoe box first to show me and took out a pair of pink leather cowboy boots with silver decorations on them and some rhinestones that made them sparkle. I have never been a very pink girl but I thought they looked cute, like something Barbie would wear. Then she opened the round box and showed me a pink leather Stetson that matched the boots. You could tell from the smell that they were real leather and probably very expensive. She put them back in their boxes and told me to let the hair and makeup team do their work. I sat watching music videos on the TV while they worked on my face and hair with curling longs and lots of spray. The lady doing my makeup was the same as before but this time someone else was doing my hair. Like before she put a bit of makeup on my nipples to make them stand out more but instead of using powder to stop me being shiny this time time she got me to stand in the bathroom and sprayed me all over with a very thin oil and water mix then rubbed it in to make my skin glow a bit like polished wood. She said it was the same thing bodybuilders and adult nude models did.

I came back out and Martha helped me put on the boots, holding her hand so I would not have to sit on the bed, then I put on the hat and finally I was allowed to look in the mirror. I was very surprised. I would never have recognised myself! Martha had said that the plaits would be a sort of disguise but this was even better. I bet I could stand right next to one of the posters of me like this looking like I normally do and nobody would know it was me! Martha said I looked even more delicious than before and she was sure people were going to love my pictures. Martha gave me a robe to put on and we went down in the private lift that only people with a key can use. The hair and makeup ladies came too in case they needed to do touch-ups. There was nobody in the corridor outside the conference room and when we went in Claude was there but not Moira this time and so was Mrs Webber and the same team of photographers and their assistants from before.

Along one wall was a big green screen that covered the floor too like the ones they film action scenes in front of for movies like Star Wars and there was a big green block too like a sofa with no back. I said I was a bit sad as I liked the barn but Claude said this was really better as they could put me in any place or just have me against a blank background so the photos could be used for lots of different things. He showed me a bikini the same pink as the hat with silver beads on it and I asked if I really had to wear it and told him what I thought about the pictures in the Texas flag bikini. He and Martha said I had to at least get the photos taken in it but they wouldn’t use them if they didn’t have to.

I took my robe off and Claude clapped and put his hands over his mouth in delight then Mrs Webber started fussing over me and said some of the oil was smudged and rubbed it it into my belly and rump. She said I looked delicious and I said well the Cannibal Queen would know and she winked at me so I am sure the message under my video was from her! Martha looked a bit cross and said we needed to get on so I stood in front of the screen and did all the same poses I did before. Being indoors with all those lights made it a lot hotter than the barn had been but Martha promised I was doing great.

When we had done all the pictures and recorded versions of the little video clips we did last time, the ladies touched up my makeup a bit and put more spray in my hair and fluffed it up then I put the bikini bottoms on and we shot everything again then again with the top as well.

When we were done, Martha said she and Claude had to go back to the office to make sure the photos got edited in time to send them to the printers for tomorrow (today) and said I should got back to the apartment to shower and change then she would send a car for me. It was quite late so Mrs Webber said she would make sure I got dinner too. Martha made me promise I would put the hat and boots back in their boxes when I got upstairs then she and Claude left and the team started taking down the studio setup.

I thought Mrs Webber would stay to help them but instead she said she should come back up with me to make sure I got back to the apartment safely. I put the robe on over the bikini and we rode the lift together. I told her all about the new campaign office and she said she couldn’t wait to see it and she was excited for my website to go live. When we got to the apartment she said she should come in in case I needed any help getting the oil off and getting the spray out of my hair. I sat on the bed in my robe and she helped me take the boots off and we put them and the hat away like I had promised Martha then I went to take a shower and she came to the bathroom with me. She stood back a little bit so she didn’t get wet but helped me soap my back and rump where I couldn’t reach myself and helped me wash my hair. When I came out I felt more like me again and put on my jeans and a Stars jersey. Mrs Webber took me down to the hotel restaurant and got me ham and eggs with French fries and a chocolate brownie sundae to follow. When I was done I messaged Martha to say I was ready and she sent a car to pick me up. Mrs Webber waited outside with me to make sure I got in safely and Martha was there to meet me at the house.

Today Martha gave me the new pictures and I sent them to Jessie who said it looked like I was trying to copy her by having my hair curly. I said that was just what the lady had done, then she said I looked like Dolly Parton but without the boobs. I wonder when mine will start to grow? Mrs Webbers are very big but I don’t think my mom’s were. It would be fun to have little ones at least before I get eaten. I guess that will depend how long the campaign takes? Martha said the printers got all the new pictures signed off and the website has been updated but she decided to wait to put the press release out until Monday just in case there are any more issues over the weekend.

[Editor’s Note – The next two entries do not contain any relevant material so have been omitted here.]


Monday 13th May 2019

The website went live this morning and my team started posting using the hashtag #eatme trying to get other girls to use it too. All the pictures on the website are of me in the nude and Martha said those are the ones that will be going on billboards and other posters but some of the adverts in magazines will have to use the bikini shots for now. Luckily nobody wants to use the ones with just the bottoms as I really don’t like those.

Martha said already there are lots of people who want to interview me. She is getting more hats and boots in different colours couriered in overnight and she said not to respond to any messages I get until she has done some practice with me. She said the best thing to do will be to announce a press-conference for the end of the week and give everyone a chance to get excited about it then we can take interview requests. She said I might see people saying bad stuff about me too and not to get upset.

I messaged Jessie and asked if she had seen the website and she said she had but her mom had come in while she was looking at it and got made at her and said if she caught her looking at it again she would take her computer away so we will have to be careful. It makes me really sad that her mom is not being more understanding. She still works for Daddy so I might try to talk to her next time we are in LA or if she comes here.

Martha ordered all the furniture and tech for the campaign office over the weekend and people are coming to start fitting it today. She said it should be finished by Wednesday and we should be able to have the press conference there on Friday. I can’t wait to see!

Earlier on she asked me to write my name how I would if I was signing a birthday card and I did with a heat as the dot on the i and she said the marketing team are going to turn it into a logo like Walt Disney’s name and I will have to learn how it write it like that for when I sign autographs. With the different look and now a partly made-up signature it really feels like the Sidney who will front the campaign is just a character I will be playing and we just happen to have the same name. Good job my mom was an actress. I hope I have inherited some of her skills even though I didn’t know her. Martha said a voice coach is coming to see me this afternoon as they think I need to sound more Texan. She said I am going to spend a few hours with her every day this week so by Friday I will be able to speak that way naturally but she said I have to keep practising. I know my Daddy’s accent gets a lot stronger when he talks to the news or in front of cameras so I guess this is the same.

I went on the cannibal sites to see if people were talking about my website and it seemed to be the number one topic which is cool with lots of people saying I looked yummy but asking which girl from the old videos I was. I had a general look online although I’d promised Martha I wouldn’t comment on anything. A lot of people seemed to be quite shocked and lots through it was some kind of joke or fake to make some sort of political point – Satire they call that. But there were a lot of people who seemed to be supportive saying that if it was what I wanted then why not and saying I looked yummy. It feels weird to suddenly be so famous!

(To be continued...)