The journey was longer and more strenuous than she had anticipated. Dusk was already falling when she reached the campsite. The reception was closed; only an elderly couple was inside the store, preparing for the next day.

"Can I camp here for a few nights?" Yangtao asked the elderly man. He regarded her for a moment, unusually direct and pointed for someone from this culture. Then he turned his gaze to the woman, who registered her protest with a twitch of her eyelid.

"There's a quiet and very beautiful spot at the back of the grounds. There's a fire pit and direct access to the lake," he said, declining her request to check into the campsite. Someone will come this evening and light a fire for her.

Yangtao easily found the spot and set up camp. It wasn't long before a young man appeared, stacked firewood, and lit a fire. Afterward, he sat by the fire and watched the flames grow stronger. The night by the lake was damp and cold, and the fire radiated warmth, so she sat down opposite the man.

He began to speak softly:

"I come from a city in India. I grew up there in a diamond-trading family. We weren't rich, but we made ends meet. When I finished school, I started my own business cutting and polishing small diamonds, which weren't profitable on the world market. My business was very successful, and after a few years, I started a family with a school friend.
"She was very beautiful, very, very beautiful." He paused for a few minutes. "We Indians, you must understand, believe in the power of Charma and in eternal rebirth. My wife became pregnant, and the doctors said it would be a girl. Out of foolish paternal pride, I bought the child a pair of red shoes and gave them to my wife. At the time, as an up-and-coming young entrepreneur, I wasn't very empathetic, but I still noticed how my beloved wife froze at the sight of the shoes, and panic began to spread through her heart. I didn't want to ruin that moment, so I left her alone with her premonition. Meanwhile, it became known that my merchandise consisted mainly of blood diamonds, but I didn't want to let that ruin my business. One morning, the bed next to me was empty. It remained empty, and all inquiries came to nothing. The weeks passed without me seeing any sign of my wife. By then, my business had also collapsed, so I sought advice and help in my religion. It helped me understand that everything is interconnected and trapped in an eternal cycle. So it was probably predestined that I would..." I came across that internet documentary about Aokigahara Forest. The filmmakers showed close-ups of human remains, tents, clothing, and shoes. Small red shoes were visible on the half-decomposed body of a woman. I recognized her immediately.

I used the rest of my money to come here. I spent weeks searching for my wife's body. Then one afternoon, we were reunited. She had hanged herself; her head and parts of her spine were mummified and hanging from the rope. I placed her remains in a box and removed the rope and the other items I found there. I left only the small red shoes at the spot where she had died.

I arranged a cremation and the official declaration of her death. Afterward, I was summoned for a meeting by the park administration and another individual. They suggested that my intervention, let's say, stretched a number of conventions. Normally, Japanese authorities would have taken drastic action in comparable cases, which can result in lengthy prison sentences. However, in their view, this was a special case. The district was bothered by the fact that Aokigahara Forest was increasingly making headlines on social media as the "Suicide Forest." The desecration of burial sites, as it's legally termed, was a particular concern for them. There were even organized tours through the forest now. Officially, they couldn't take any action in the forest—cleaning up, removing evidence, or covering their tracks. The potential for worldwide public outrage would be far too high. My case, however, had shown them a way out, and so they offered to pay me for a ranger's services, albeit without an employment contract.


These cases, however, had presented them with a solution, and so they offered to pay me for the services of a ranger, albeit without an employment contract.


The district was particularly concerned about the desecration of burial sites, as is the legally defined term. Since then, I've been working with the park, but why am I telling you all this?

My presence hasn't gone unnoticed, and I'm often asked for advice when people are here who, let's say, give a certain impression. For example, I can light a fire for them, listen to their story, or help them in any way I can think of."

Yangtao had listened attentively the whole time. It was late, and after the long journey, she hadn't yet fully grasped the message he had conveyed.

>>29784
As the sun rose above the trees, the tent immediately became stuffy. Yangtao had lain awake for quite some time, gazing almost raptly at the play of light and shadow cast by the leaves on the parachute silk. Now it was time to face the new day. As she unzipped the tent, cool, damp morning air poured in, a ray of light dazzling her eyes. Gradually, her brain began to connect these perceptions with her memories. She had arrived at Motosuko Camping Ground after a difficult journey, or so she thought. She vaguely remembered an elderly couple and a campfire with crackling flames. And then there was something else, a story, or had this already been part of a dream? "Definitely too much information to process before my first coffee," she muttered to herself. After freshening up in the lake, she left her new home to search for breakfast. A traveling vendor was selling pastries and serving them with black tea. She had come to realize the magnitude of her undertaking. In Korea, it had seemed so simple: a journey, a forest, a rope, and she would step into the eternal darkness. But on site, her old life seemed to gradually fade away, just as the colors of day lose their vibrancy during the golden hour, shifting into shades of gray. But no, this image wasn't accurate, because gray had been more the essence of life in Korea. At the place where she would die, rich, contrasting colors prevailed. In contrast, the people were reserved, almost inconspicuous. For years, it had been her heartfelt wish to die in Aokigahara Forest, and now she realized that she had obviously prepared imperfectly for the journey. She had carried a suitable rope in the small backpack she was wearing, but for the first few days, she had wanted to familiarize herself with the location. Like an old friend, she was greeted by the bulky wooden sign, familiar from countless documentaries. The warning and safety notices, a popular souvenir among tourists, were also there. Initially, the forest was much brighter than she had expected. Only several kilometers from the road did the undergrowth thicken, and mosses hung from the branches. A narrow path branched off from the main trail, and Yangtao decided to follow it. The path descended for a while and then followed a small stream. This was arduous, as the ground was uneven and the roots slippery. The sun was at its zenith when she saw the ribbon. Suicides often unwind a ribbon behind them so they can find their way back. It is a thin thread that connects them to life, showing them the possibility of returning. And they are a symbol of individualism. There are strings for pragmatists; flat silk ribbons are often used by women. They are red, yellow, or purple. This one had already disintegrated from the sunlight; at its end, at best, lay bones and the plastic products that everyone considers indispensable today. Yangtao had no interest in horror tourism; very soon her own body would decompose on the forest floor until the flesh gave way to the bones. Then her bones, too, would appear on the internet, perhaps gaining more followers than she had now. A purple ribbon was tied to a thin branch with a bow, and it was brand new. Carefully, she bent the branch apart, careful not to break any. The leaves rustled softly under her feet. The ribbon led her to the edge of a clearing where a tree stood. A tree and a young woman. She wore sandals and a dress with a lace collar. She was carefully positioning a noose for herself, her hangman's loop. Yangtao was captivated by the sight and the beauty of the moment; she pressed herself silently into the undergrowth like a deer, so that she could observe everything from a distance.

>>29844
The girl widens the noose so she can put her head through it. Then she tightens the knot behind her head again. The noose hangs too low for a full suspension, so she'll try a partial one. The girl takes off her shoes and bends her knees as if in prayer, but her knees don't quite reach the ground; she swings on her tiptoes, hanging by her neck. Gracefully, she pushes her skirt down a little and slides her hands between her thighs. Her face begins to turn pink, and judging by the sounds she makes, she's experiencing her final climax. But suddenly, she stops and looks directly into Yangtao's eyes.

>>29844
>>29784

"I heard you coming earlier; you were watching me. I probably would have done the same in your place. I don't mind what you saw; in fact, I'm glad you're here." "You're here to kill yourself too, am I right?"

Yangtao answered with a slight nod. She felt a little ashamed at having intruded on the stranger's personal space. But her words, or rather her gestures, spoke of universal love and appreciation. She seemed to be expecting an embrace, and that was precisely what Yangtao had been craving for ages. She stepped out of the bushes and snuggled against the woman. Her body was warm, a light scent of perfume lingering on her supple skin. Beneath it were the tendons and firm muscles of a high-performance athlete. Her shinbones were deformed by years of training, turned outwards, like a classical dancer. The woman pulled her close, and Yangtao returned the intimate embrace. Tears streamed from her eyes as the sobbing engulfed her body and mind like a thunderstorm. All the emotions she had suppressed for years were unleashed in that single moment. Hatred, longing, love, disappointment, betrayal, and much more coursed through her body at the same moment; she practically merged with her friend in her arms. A soft whisper reached her ears.

>>29857
"It's good, everything is good, you've arrived, and this is the perfect time and the perfect place for you. Accept it, let go, and be kind to your past. Everything is good and is as it should be." The words and the tenderness had a calming effect; her emotions dissipated just as a thunderstorm soaks into the sandy soil. But she still didn't feel strong enough to relinquish the protection of the close embrace. Weeping softly, she replied, "Looking back, I never truly lived. I'm an empty shell, and now I just want it all to be over. The only thing I might regret when I die is that I never made love, meaning with a partner, you know, with two people." The woman laid Yangtao's head on her neck and gave her plenty of time until she had finished crying. With the top of her dress, she dried the last tears on her cheeks, gently loosening the embrace.

>>29858

"I chose this place to die," the woman whispered. "Under this dress, I'm already wearing the clothes I'll wear in death, but before I do, I want to grant your wish, just as I hope you'll grant me one afterward."

Her hands slid down to her waist and grasped the belt around Yangtao's jumpsuit.